#come on guys the was has been going on for over a YEAR

[kiwriteswords]

Maybe some already together hotch and reader parenting Jack?

Heartstrings Attached [Aaron Hotchner x Female Reader]

Masterlist || Ao3||Word Count: 3k|| AN: this was fun and really nothing like I have written before! I was re-watching The Nanny pilot where Maggie has her first kiss and Mr. Sheffield's reaction made me wonder how Hotch would react to Jack dating!

Tags/Warnings: established relationship, family vibes, mentions of Haley's death, Teenage Jack Hotchner, Jack's first kiss, Jack's first crush, Jack's first heartbreak, Sad Hotch Hours, Missing Haley Hotchner Hours, hurt/comfort, Jack preferring Reader over Hotch, angsty Jack, No mention of if Reader is BAU or not, future fic, fluffy fluff fluff

Summary: Navigating parenthood is hard enough, but add in teenage love and angst, and Hotch was in for it--grateful to have you at his side, he struggles when Jack prefers your comfort to his own.

In the Hotchner household, evenings typically unfolded with a quiet kind of routine, the kind that comes with the stability of an established relationship and shared space. But tonight, as Aaron Hotchner watched Jack, now a teenager taller than himself, pacing back and forth in your living room, he sensed a disruption to your usual peace.

Jack had always been an anxious kid--much of that hung on Aaron’s shoulders, from all that his job took from and brought into Jack’s life. 

"You seem... preoccupied," Aaron remarked, his voice calm as he set aside the case file he'd been reading. Jack stopped pacing and glanced at his father, then at you, who were curled up on the other end of the couch with a book in hand.

"It's nothing," Jack muttered, clearly wrestling with whether to share more. You looked over at Aaron, giving him a subtle nod, an unspoken signal between the two of you that said, 'Give him a minute.'

After a brief pause, Jack sighed and turned towards you, his expression torn between embarrassment and the trust he'd come to place in you over the years. "Actually, I... there's this girl at school."

You set your book down, your full attention on Jack. "Oh? What about her?" you asked gently.

Jack blushed, his hands shoved deep into his pockets as he mumbled, "I kinda like her. A lot. And I think she might like me too, but I don’t know what to do about it."

Aaron observed the exchange, feeling a twinge of something unfamiliar. Jealousy? No, it was more akin to inadequacy. Here was his son, coming to you with matters he was too embarrassed to discuss with his own father. But watching the ease with which Jack confided in you softened any hard feelings; if anything, it filled him with gratitude.

"What do you like about her?" you inquired, your voice laced with interest and devoid of any judgment.

"She's funny, and she likes a lot of the stuff I do. And she’s really smart," Jack explained, his eyes lighting up as he spoke.

"That sounds wonderful, Jack," you responded, smiling encouragingly. "Have you guys talked much?"

"Yeah, at lunch and stuff. I just... don't know if I should tell her how I feel, or even how to do that," Jack confessed, looking towards his father now.

Aaron cleared his throat, feeling suddenly on the spot. "Well, Jack, the truth is, being honest about your feelings is usually the best approach. It’s not easy, but it’s straightforward. Just... be yourself," Aaron advised, trying to recall how he’d navigated his own youthful crushes, which felt like a lifetime ago.

"You think I should just tell her?" Jack asked, his tone a mix of hope and nerves.

"I do," Aaron said, nodding. "But maybe you could start by asking her to hang out, just the two of you. See how it goes from there."

Jack considered this for a moment, then turned to you. "What do you think?"

"I agree with your dad," you said, your gaze soft yet earnest. "And whatever happens, we're here for you. It's okay to be nervous, and it's okay if things don't go exactly how you plan. What's important is that you're honest and respectful."

Jack nodded, taking in the advice from both of you. "Thanks," he said, a genuine smile breaking through his earlier anxious demeanor. "I think I’ll ask her to the movies this weekend."

"That sounds like a great idea," you encouraged, and Aaron couldn’t help but smile at the warm, supportive dynamic that had blossomed between you and Jack. It wasn’t the traditional picture of a family, perhaps, but it was yours, and it was filled with love and understanding.

Later that evening, as Jack headed upstairs, Aaron lingered behind with you, his expression thoughtful. "Thank you," he murmured, reaching for your hand. "For being here, for being you. For making things like this easier for him... and for me."

You squeezed his hand, leaning into him slightly. "We’re a team, Aaron. And I love being a part of this family."

He nodded, the weight of his earlier feelings of inadequacy lifting in the comfort of your presence. In this household, amidst the quiet routines and the occasional teenage turmoil, Aaron found not just solace but a deep, enduring partnership. And as he looked at you, he knew with certainty that together, there was nothing you couldn't handle.

Aaron Hotchner watched his son, Jack, meticulously adjust his collar for the third time in the mirror. The teenager's movements were stiff, each motion betraying a level of tension that Aaron knew all too well—it was a mirror to his own.

"You look great, Jack. She's going to think so, too," Aaron commented, attempting a reassuring tone as he leaned against the doorway of Jack’s room.

Jack met his father's gaze in the mirror, his eyes flashing briefly with a familiar intensity. "What if I don’t even know what to say? What if—"

"Jack," Aaron interjected, a bit more sharply than intended, "you've prepared enough. Overthinking it won't help."

The words were meant to steady, but they landed like a challenge. Jack turned abruptly, his expression hardening. "You don’t understand. It’s easy for you to say—"

Aaron felt a prickle of irritation. "Jack, I’m trying to help you. There’s no reason to—"

"Yeah, by telling me I’m overthinking? Thanks a lot," Jack snapped, his tone biting, and stormed past Aaron towards the stairs.

You appeared at the bottom of the staircase, having caught the tail end of the exchange. Your expression was one of concern mixed with calm. "Everything okay?" you asked, looking from Jack’s retreating back to Aaron’s tight expression.

Aaron sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "He’s just nervous," he muttered, following you and Jack to the car.

The ride to the movie theater was tense, the air thick with unspoken apologies and frustrations. Aaron drove, his hands gripping the steering wheel a little too tightly, while you sat beside him, offering a gentle presence. In the backseat, Jack was silent, lost in his own whirlwind of teenage angst.

When you arrived at the theater, Jack unbuckled his seatbelt and paused, his hand on the door. He seemed to struggle with himself for a moment before turning slightly. "Sorry for snapping, Dad. I’m just... really nervous."

Aaron nodded, a mixture of relief and concern in his eyes. "It’s okay, Jack. Just be yourself, she’ll see how great you are."

Jack managed a small, grateful smile before stepping out of the car and into the evening crowd. As he walked away, Aaron watched him go, a pang of helplessness touching his heart. It wasn’t just about tonight; it was the creeping realization of how much he would have to learn to navigate as Jack grew up.

You reached over, touching Aaron’s arm. "He’s going to be fine," you murmured. "And so are you."

Aaron let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. "It never gets easier, does it? Letting them face things on their own."

You shook your head, your smile gentle. "No, but we do get better at trusting them to handle it. And Jack knows he has us to come back to, no matter how it goes."

Aaron glanced at you, the steady assurance in your voice grounding him. "I don’t know what I’d do without you," he admitted, the weight of his role as a single parent momentarily overwhelming.

"You’d do just fine," you assured him, squeezing his arm. "But you don’t have to. We’re in this together, remember?"

He smiled then, a genuine smile that reached his eyes. "Together," he echoed, feeling the truth of that word deep in his bones.

As you and Aaron drove back home, the earlier tension melted away, replaced by a comfortable silence that spoke of shared burdens and joint victories. In that moment, Aaron knew that whatever challenges lay ahead with Jack, or with anything else, they were surmountable—as long as you were there beside him.

When Aaron and you arrived at the theater to pick up Jack, the sight of him waiting by the curb instantly signaled a change. There was a lightness in his step, a barely contained energy that was unusual for the typically composed teenager.

Jack slid into the backseat, a faint, almost secretive smile playing at the corners of his lips. He said nothing as Aaron pulled away from the curb, glancing occasionally in the rearview mirror at his son. Jack’s eyes were bright, his usual tension nowhere to be seen, replaced by an excited glimmer that Aaron had rarely witnessed.

The car was quiet, the silence stretching as Aaron and you exchanged knowing looks. Both of you could sense the bubbling enthusiasm Jack was struggling to contain, yet neither of you wanted to press him, giving him the space to share in his own time.

Finally, unable to bear the suspense any longer and always more attuned to breaking the ice, you turned slightly in your seat to face Jack. “So? How was the movie?” you asked, your voice casual but tinged with an undercurrent of excitement for him.

Jack’s response was immediate, his words tumbling out in a rush. “It was awesome! We...” He paused, a flush spreading across his cheeks, and then he burst out with it. “We kissed! It was my first kiss.”

Aaron’s eyes met Jack’s in the rearview mirror, a smile breaking across his face at his son's joyous exclamation. The car filled with a warm, buoyant energy, the kind that comes from witnessing a milestone in someone you love dearly.

“That’s great, Jack!” you exclaimed, your delight evident. “How do you feel?”

Jack laughed, a sound of pure happiness. “I like her so much. She’s amazing. And the kiss was... it was perfect, I think. I mean, I don’t really have anything to compare it to, but...” His voice trailed off, and he shrugged, almost sheepishly.

Aaron listened, his heart swelling with a mix of pride and a poignant touch of sadness at the reminders of his own first experiences with love. “It sounds like you had a really good time,” he said, his tone supportive. “I’m happy for you, Jack.”

“Thanks, Dad. And thank you,” Jack added, looking at you. “For the advice and... just for being there.”

You nodded, your expression soft. “Anytime, Jack. We’re both so happy it went well.”

The rest of the drive home was filled with Jack sharing more details about the evening—the movie they’d barely watched, the nervous moments leading up to the kiss, and his plans to see her again. Aaron drove, listening and occasionally glancing back at Jack, who seemed to grow with each word he spoke.

When you all arrived home, Jack bounded out of the car with a quick, “Thanks for the ride!” before heading inside, no doubt eager to relive the evening in his mind.

Aaron turned to you, his eyes reflecting a complex mix of emotions. “He’s growing up fast,” he murmured, the reality hitting him anew.

You reached over, taking his hand. “He is. But he’s growing up well, Aaron. That’s all we can ask for.”

Aaron squeezed your hand in response, the solidity of your presence grounding him. “Yes, that’s all we can ask for,” he agreed, the pride evident in his voice. As you headed into the house together, Aaron felt a profound gratitude for the family you had become, imperfections and all, bound together by moments of simple, shared joy like tonight.

Over dinner, Jack's enthusiasm was infectious. As he detailed his plans to woo his new crush with flowers and romantic gestures straight out of the movies, Aaron couldn't help but share amused, knowing glances with you across the table. Every so often, Jack would catch them mid-glance and roll his eyes, a grin unable to hide his embarrassment.

"You think I'm being too cheesy, don't you?" Jack asked a playful accusation in his tone.

"Not at all," you replied, smiling warmly at him. "It's sweet. It's nice to see someone still believes in doing romantic things. Flowers are always a good idea."

Aaron nodded in agreement, watching as Jack considered your advice. "Just make sure you pick ones she likes," he added. "It shows you pay attention."

Jack nodded enthusiastically, absorbing every piece of advice like a sponge. "I’ll find out what her favorites are," he resolved.

The conversation lingered on lighter topics as you finished eating, but the warmth of family and shared understanding lingered in the air.

Later that night, as Aaron and you were getting ready for bed, the atmosphere shifted to a quieter, more reflective mood. You turned to Aaron as he was folding his clothes, a soft smile playing on your lips. "You know, Jack is a lot like you," you mused. "Even as a teenager, he’s got your sweetness. And he gets this giddy excitement about someone he cares about—just like you."

Aaron met your gaze in the mirror, a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Was I that obvious?" he asked, though he already knew the answer.

"Completely," you teased gently, stepping closer. "I still remember our early days. Despite your stoic exterior, you had this way of showing your excitement that was... really endearing."

He turned to face you fully, his expression softening. "I guess some things don’t change," he admitted, reaching out to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "I still feel that way, you know. Every day with you."

Your eyes lit up at his words, and you leaned into his touch. "And I love that about you, Aaron. It’s the little things you do, the way you show you care. It’s never lost on me."

The conversation lingered in the air, settling warmly around them like a blanket. It reminded Aaron of how much he still wanted to make you feel special, how even the simplest gestures could speak volumes.

"Jack gave me a good reminder; I think I’ll buy you flowers tomorrow," Aaron declared softly, more to himself than to you.

You chuckled softly, your eyes twinkling with affection. "I’d like that," you said. 

As you finished getting ready for bed, the connection between them felt as fresh and exciting as it did in the early days of your relationship, a testament to the enduring nature of deep, genuine love.

It wasn’t long until the atmosphere of the Hotchner household shifted dramatically one afternoon when Jack burst through the front door, his usual calm demeanor replaced by a storm of teenage angst. He rushed past Aaron and you, not stopping to greet or even acknowledge either of you, his footsteps thundering up the stairs. Moments later, his bedroom door slammed shut with a force that echoed down the hallway.

You and Aaron exchanged a look of concern, both sensing the gravity of whatever had upset Jack so deeply. Aaron's jaw set in a familiar, determined line as he made his way to Jack's room, knocking softly despite the previous display of anger.

"Jack, can we talk?" Aaron called through the door, his voice calm but firm.

There was a tense pause, then a muffled, "Go away," from inside.

Aaron opened the door anyway, stepping into Jack’s room to find him sitting on the edge of his bed, his face buried in his hands. "Jack, whatever it is, I’m here to help," Aaron offered, trying to bridge the gap with understanding.

Jack looked up, his eyes red and his expression one of raw, unguarded pain. "You wouldn’t understand," he snapped, his words laced with frustration. "You met Mom in school and then found Y/N so easily after Mom passed. You’ve never had your heart broken like this."

The comment stung, bringing with it a flood of memories—of Haley, of loss, of the deepest kind of heartbreak Aaron had ever known. But he had to laugh internally at the irony; Jack had no idea what real heartbreak was, yet his feelings were valid in their own teenage context.

"Jack, I may not understand exactly what you're feeling right now, but I’ve experienced loss, more than just once. I can try to help," Aaron said, his voice even despite the emotional undercurrent.

Aaron looked around his son’s room--oh, how it had changed so much over the last few years. The legos and drawings now replaced with soccer trophies and posters.

"It’s not the same!" Jack retorted, his anger flaring again. "You don’t get it. She said she just wants to be friends, after everything... after the kiss. I thought... I don’t know what I thought."

Aaron sat down beside him, trying to close the distance. "It’s tough, feeling like you’ve been pushed aside," he offered. "But it doesn’t diminish what you felt, or what you meant to each other."

Jack shook his head, the rejection too fresh, too raw. "Just leave, Dad. Please," he murmured, not meeting Aaron's eyes.

Respecting his son’s request, Aaron stood and left the room, the door closing softly behind him this time. He returned downstairs, where you were waiting, having sensed that the conversation might not have gone smoothly.

Aaron relayed the interaction to you, his features tight with concern and helplessness. "He’s really hurting," Aaron confessed, the weight of his role as a father feeling particularly heavy.

You stepped closer, wrapping your arms around him. "You did what you could. He just needs some time," you reassured him, your voice soothing. "Heartbreak is a part of growing up, as hard as it is to watch. He'll learn from this, with us to support him."

Aaron nodded, leaning into your embrace, grateful for your presence and perspective. "It’s just hard, seeing him go through it," he admitted. "Makes me wish I could shield him from all the pain."

"But then he wouldn’t really grow, would he?" you pointed out gently. "All we can do is be here when he’s ready to talk, ready to heal."

"Right," Aaron agreed, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. "Thank you," he added, the gratitude in his voice reflecting more than just thanks for this moment—it was for every moment you stood by him, helping him navigate the complexities of fatherhood and life itself. Together, you would be ready for when Jack decided to open up, ready to guide him through the pain toward healing.

Later that evening, as Aaron sat in the living room thumbing through an old case file, he couldn't shake the image of Jack’s hurt expression. He was roused from his thoughts by the sound of footsteps descending the stairs. Looking up, he saw Jack hesitating at the foot of the staircase, his eyes darting between Aaron and the hallway where you were.

"Dad, can I talk to Y/N?" Jack asked quietly, his voice revealing his vulnerability.

Aaron felt a pang in his chest, torn between relief that Jack was seeking comfort and a sting of jealousy that it wasn’t from him. He thought of Haley, of how things might have been different if she were here, but then he looked at you, emerging from the hallway behind Jack, and his heart filled with gratitude. You had become an integral part of their lives, filling spaces he hadn't known were empty.

"Of course, Jack," Aaron replied, managing a supportive smile as he watched you approach, your presence reassuring and steady.

You gave Aaron a gentle look that seemed to understand his mixed emotions before turning your attention to Jack. "Let’s talk, okay?" you said softly, guiding Jack back to his room for privacy.

Left alone with his thoughts, Aaron reflected on his journey—the loss of Haley, the challenges of single parenthood, and the unexpected blessing of finding love again with you. It was a complex tapestry of grief and new beginnings.

When you and Jack reappeared a while later, there was a noticeable shift in Jack’s demeanor. He seemed calmer, more composed, and he walked straight up to Aaron.

"I’m sorry for pushing you away earlier, Dad. I didn’t mean to," Jack apologized, his eyes earnest.

Aaron stood, setting aside the file, and pulled Jack into a hug. "It’s okay, Jack. I understand. It’s not easy, and I’m here whenever you need to talk, okay?"

Jack nodded, returning the embrace. "Thanks, Dad."

As they settled onto the couch, Aaron next to you and Jack opposite, the atmosphere was lighter. Aaron felt the need to address the earlier tension and offer some fatherly advice.

"Jack, life... it throws a lot at us. Heartbreak, loss—it’s all part of it. But so is happiness and love," Aaron began, his eyes flicking to you, then back to Jack. "You have plenty of time to find your happy ending. And sometimes, it happens when you least expect it."

He reached over, taking your hand in his, a silent testament to his words.

Jack smiled, a touch of red coloring his cheeks as he understood the implication. "I guess you’re right. I’ve got time."

"And remember, no matter what, you’re never alone," you added, squeezing Aaron’s hand. "We’re both here for you, always."

The rest of the evening passed with a new sense of understanding and closeness among you all. Aaron felt a deep sense of peace as he looked at you and Jack--his family. At this moment, he knew that despite the trials and the losses, you had found a way to build something enduring and real. And for Aaron, you were indeed his happy ending, the unexpected joy that had come from a time of great loss.

Tag List: @zaddyhotch @estragos @todorokishoe24 @looking1016  @khxna @rousethemouse @averyhotchner @reidfile @bernelflo @lover-of-books-and-tea @frickin-bats @sleepysongbirdsings @justyourusualash @person-005 @iyskgd @hiireadstuff @kcch-ns @alexxavicry

[hannieehaee]

CREEP (teaser)

18+ / mdi

summary: jungkook's in love. finally, after years of waiting for that perfect romance, he finds himself utterly infatuated with the perfect girl. too bad she has no idea who he is. but it's okay, he knows enough about you for the two of you, and he'll make sure to work his way into your life.

content: stalker!jungkook, clueless!reader, lowkey inspired by you from netflix, stalking, reader is surveilled by jk without her permission, smut, afab reader, masturbation (both m and f receiving), jk watches her have sex and masturbating, penetrative sex, creampie, finger sucking, etc.

wc: 1.1k (teaser); 10.2k (full fic)

RELEASE DATE: february 3rd

or you can check it out on my patreon today by subscribing!

a/n: this came to mind after binge watching you on netflix hehe<3

masterlist

You'd gone on another date tonight.

This was the fifth one this month.

Always a different guy. Jungkook had been keeping count.

It was hard to not let it get to him. Sure, he was aware that you didn't owe him anything, and much less did he feel as if he held any sort of ownership over you, bu the more men he beheld in your presence, the less patience he had.

Jungkook knew you to be a smart girl. You were a well put-together adult, an incredibly confident and intelligent woman who needed no protection from anyone. It was one of the many things that made him fall for you. It was just the decisions you took in regard to your love life that left Jungkook bothered.

He tried not to judge you, truly he did, but seeing you go from one idiot to another pained him. Intimately so. While aware that you needed to get all these idiots out of your system, Jungkook just wasn't sure how much longer he could hold back as he watched you with this week's respective idiotic bachelor.

This time around, it was some idiot named Liam.

To the naked eye, he might've been a good pick — which is why you'd even given him the time of day, Jungkook assumed. He was tall, — but Jungkook was taller — he was fit, — but Jungkiok fitter — he had okay money — except it was none compared to Jungkook — he had everything the average woman would look for in a man. Truly, Jungkook could not blame you for thinking this might be the right guy.

But, at the same time, you sometimes had the tendency to rush things. Or at least that was what Jungkook had noticed after the past few months of watching you.

The same had happened with Liam.

After messaging for about a week, you'd found yourself at a late night date.

It was the usual. Dinner, walk around a nearby park, and finalizing with a solicitous invitation to your apartment. That much was fine with Jungkook. He didn't care (well, he very much did). A man vying for your affections was not shocking to him. You were perfect. Jungkook was certain of it.

It was what happened behind closed doors that churned his insides out.

Maybe it had been a bad idea when Jungkook decided to install a camera in your apartment, but he couldn't help himself. It had seemed inviting at the time. You had been gone on a family vacation for a week, leaving your place completely vacant, too inviting for him to not take the chance to look around.

And look around, he did.

Out of all the time in which he'd known you, that had been the best day of all. Getting to be in an environment tailored to you and by you had been heaven.

He laid on your bed, letting himself be engulfed by the scent of your shampoo on your pillow. He'd chuckled at all the adorable plushies scattered throughout your place. He'd installed his cameras, ensuring the ability to supervise in case the occasion were to come up.

But his most favorite had been the souvenirs he'd taken with him. The pretty lace set he'd taken as a memento to ensure he had a little piece of you with him at all times.

Currently, as he went over today's events whilst in bed, that pretty set sat on his pillow — on the side of the bed he decided would be yours as soon as he made you his ...

Going back to more pressing matters. That idiot, Liam.

God, even thinking about how the night had ended made him angry. How did you pick these guys? Well, Jungkook knew the how (usually some shitty dating app), but he just couldn't understand the why.

Your dinner had been subpar at best. Liam had picked the shittiest 'fancy' restaurant available. He had ordered for you (whilst picking the cheapest options available), hadn't even bothered to buy you quality wine, and took a ten-minute bathroom break halfway through dinner — which he had spent on some stupid phone call to a buddy of his. Talk about priorities.

Going back home, he parked too far from your apartment for some stupid reason or other, choosing to walk you under a thinly-veiled pretense to make sure you arrived home safely. Instead, he went home with you despite not deserving such privilege.

This time around, Jungkook could tell that you weren't too enthusiastic to allow him in, but it seemed ritualistic to you by now. He argued that maybe you wanted at least one thing to come out of the date, even if that was just some meaningless sex.

Except that the sex had been even worse than anything that came prior.

At first, Jungkook felt morally ambiguous as he watched the live feed of the camera he'd installed in your apartment, but considering that he had already followed you to your date (under disguise, of course), this wasn't all that bad.

The foreplay had been nonexistent (his first mistake, Jungkook was very well aware), leaving you dissatisfied before it all even began. Barely wet and not stimulated at all, you laid there, letting that undeserving idiot do a novice's job at fingering you. Jungkook caught onto the winces on your face as the dumbass worked you with zero finesse. It was a complete disaster that left you just as dry as you'd been since walking through the door.

The worst part of all had been the actual sex itself. Jungkook was genuinely appalled at Liam's ability to get gradually worse as the night progressed.

For starters, you didn't cum. Jungkook would've been able to spot a fake orgasm from you from miles away. You gave a great performance, he had to admit. Had he been any other idiot (re: Liam), he might've believed you. But he knew all your tells. Despite how pretty you looked, how ruinous you sounded, he knew that you'd fabricated that scene to get Liam to stop trying to make you cum to no avail.

Liam, though, had the night of his life. Of this, Jungkook was sure. He needed no confirmation for it, but he received it in the form of many incoming messages you got the following morning. After kicking Liam out the previous night, — under the premise that you had work early the next morning (because you were far too nice to tell him to get fucked) — you awoke to messages from the idiot wondering when part two would come.

Jungkook scoffed at the messages, itching to respond but knowing that if he did, he'd give away that he'd hacked into your accounts. However, he was happy to see that you'd let him down, using one excuse or another as to why you shouldn't go on a second date.

This was the usual routine you followed.

Or at least in the past three months in which Jungkook had been watching you. But now things would be different.

Because Jungkook had finally had enough.

It was time for you to meet the love of your life.

...

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[kinichval]

all at once, everything is different

he finds no meaning in celebrating the day of his birth (or creation), yet this year he finds himself whispering a wish — please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh he can recognize anywhere.

content. wanderer x rtawahist!fem!reader, wanderer is addressed as hat guy, reader can see aranara, not dating but clearly in love ykwim, one (1) kiss, hat guy hates his birthday, not-so-mean because his soft spot is showing lol, mediocre writing, slight angst if u squint. | 3.5k words

“hat guy, you have a visitor!”

the said man groans and shuts his eyes, displeased with the interruption. if ignoring the knocks were not enough to convey the message, then he will not be liable for his harsh tone over the unwanted company.

except, well, the visitor on the other side of the door happened to be his new friend — durin.

wait, what the fuck is he doing with nahida?

“hat guy!” the little dragon's enthusiasm explodes across the room. he quickly flies over to the indigo-haired scholar, taking a peek at the paperwork on his desk. “what are you doing?” his curiosity is rather adorable, though hat guy would not let that thought slip out his lips (and hopefully the dendro archon wouldn't attempt to read his mind).

“i'm working on a new thesis.” he simply responds, durin lets out an innocent ‘woah’ although he knows he doesn't fully grasp the concept. nahida giggles; the thesis proponent has been cooped up in this room for days, it's a given that scholarly papers and academic writing generally takes months before completion, but it's also clear to her that his response was merely an excuse.

“let's go out, hat guy!” durin initiates, flipping in the air as excitement rushes through his little body as he expects his first friend to agree — only to frown when hat guy scoffs, “i'm busy right now. let's plan another time.” hat guy hopes the compromise would convince his dragon friend to leave him alone and so will the dendro archon.

but no, both of them are determined to reign victorious against his convictions.

hat guy knew what day is it today, he sighs heavily, eager to stay put in his lair doing whatever academic duty there is just to avoid the light of day and utmostly reject the idea of celebration.

it's as if a simple greeting of ‘happy birthday’ bears no sense of something, it feels awkward to receive such words when he feels nothing about the beginning of his existence. was he supposed to say ‘thank you’ when in the first place it's an unsolicited message?

one of these days, he's sure to receive a smack on the back of his head if this attitude continues.

(he'll just protect his head then.)

(unless the prevailing lord of sumeru casts a more perilous punishment when he wears her patience thin.)

durin's crimson eyes dulls, the drop in his float and lowered head presents his broken heart, “allow me to go through your progress and i'll leave my own criticisms, take it as a partial checking. we wouldn't want to finish a thesis then realize the whole paper is wrong, would we?” nahida suggests, her eyes round and pleading. hat guy stares down at his desk, almost praying to some other god — probably the anemo one, though he doesn't have much faith in the freedom archon — to make nahida and durin realize that he is unavailable at the moment.

“come on, hat guy, today looks like a good—” nahida's words are immediately cut off when hat guy finally looks at their gazes, “fine!” he abruptly stands up with his palms on the desk, the split second of his widened eyes being enough evidence for nahida to see his true feelings without needing to use her mind-reading prowess.

“really?!” durin's eyes sparkle and wings flap in triumph, hat guy groans in defeat, and nahida smiles brightly. “but i'll decide when the day is over.” his tone is as cold as his color palette, but durin does not complain about his condition, his little cheers soften hat guy's bleak exterior.

hat guy detests walking around the heart of sumeru during this time of the year, he remembers in the previous year when akademiya students ambushed him just to get him to blow a sickeningly sweet birthday cake. he lowers his head, until now he can't fully comprehend the nature of birthdays and its significance — for mortals, it may be because their lifespans are merely a flick of a finger compared to non-human races.

he has already lived for so long and will continue to do so, but what part of birthdays satisfy fulfillment if he rejects it himself? it's even so absurd that he is expected to extend gestures to others on his own day.

“hey, hat guy, do you know those tiny things with hats and a smiley face?” the little dragon's query snaps hat guy out of his zoned out state, he momentarily pauses to think what creatures he is referring to before furrowing his brows at the unsure conclusion in his mind, “what things?” the boy envisions the forest spirits around sumeru, the aranara. he doubts durin means the smiles as they do not have a smile, still he remarks those elemental clusters as cute.

“those little things! with hats like yours!” durin tries his best at composing his description, “wait, they have pointy hats, yours is flat.” his voice is small at the realization of the difference in design, “you should know what i mean, right?” he flies right in front of hat guy's face, hoping that his thoughts will get through to his friend.

“perhaps you mean the aranara? they're plant-like forest spirits in sumeru. where did you see one? they don't often show themselves as i've known.” hat guy explains, he sees the bright grin on durin's face, the sight melts him.

he knows the aranara only allows their presence to be known by children (adults can see them but terms and conditions must be met first, e.g. the traveler), and deep down he hopes for durin to take sight of those little things. he believes that durin is a child at heart, not only his small size and curious nature, but his core is akin to a little kid who dreams and hopes.

“they're called aranara? it sounds adorable!” durin giggles, “i saw a couple of them tailing behind the archon! do you think i can befriend them?” hat guy smiles, his sentiments mirroring durin's aspirations. “you can go find them and ask for a friendship contract.” he smirks, obviously teasing the little dragon, though his words carry genuine wishes for durin to create friendships.

“do we like call for them? i want to talk to one!” durin's eagerness at meeting the aranara spreads warmth in his chest, “you have to be patient. they'll appear whenever they deem right.” hat guy responds, he's not entirely knowledgeable about their decisions when or when not to appear, but he knows enough that the aranara values the people of sumeru — even if they're unseen, they're the nation's closest companion.

and he's assured enough that the aranara will welcome durin just as much as he was accepted as their friend.

“there you are!” a deep voice pipes up nearby, durin hastily flies behind hat guy to hide from the unknown voice. “who's there?” the little dragon closes his eyes, the fear of being judged is still within him, hence hat guy extends out both his arms as an act of protecting durin as his gaze seeking out who had spoken to them.

the general mahamatra comes to sight, albeit the most distinguishable factor for hat guy is the tall ears poking out from his hat. his right eyebrow is raised, posing a skeptical expression at the big-eared hat guy's presence and intentions with him.

“ah, the famous hat guy of the vahumana darshan. i believe you remember me from the interdarshan championship last year?” cyno utters, there's a prideful look on his face that makes hat guy even more wary of where this is going. “i recall our sparring moments during the competition, yes, you were the representative for spantamad.” hat guy responds, he knows this man is a big persona in the nation although he couldn't dig it in his memory what his name was.

“speak your intentions, i do not have the luxury of time right now.” hat guy asserts, he watches as cyno takes a deep inhale — and wonders what it's for — before he takes hat guy's hand and slaps down a stack of cards (dear archon, how did he manage to hide a tall stack?)

“do you know about genius invokation tcg? i've been meaning to find you and discuss the game. i have high hopes that you'll be a prodigy of a player, so please hear me out. i have read a few of your research, i applaud your intelligence and critical thinking for curating reasonable claims and powerful arguments. you know what else uses the same strategy? tcg! with your keen observation, wits, and quick analysis, i'm sure you'll be sumeru's second best player — i'm the first, of course — please accept my offer and play with me, i assure you that it is an efficient mental exercise outside of the akademiya. furthermore, playing with others allows a space for building relationships and strengthening bonds. what do you say, hat guy?”

oh, cyno definitely needed that deep inhale. hat guy, on the other hand, is bewildered.

“hat guy, what is he talking about?” durin whispers in his ears, still out of sight.

“you should take upon his offer, hat guy. not only will you gain friends in sumeru, but also acquire a reputable image across teyvat.” the green-eyed desert guy (who hat guy knows as the one who's oddly interested in his hat) shows up and backs up cyno's claim.

right now, he feels like nahida casted him in some weird dream spell because what the hell is going on?

hat guy scoffs, “only brains as small as a sweet flower seed would reckon that a measly card game is enough to be a backbone of life-and-death bonds.” still, the stack of cards remained in his hand.

as if cyno was about to take no for an answer, “keep the stack, hat guy. maybe one day you'll have a change of mind, come find me if you find it in yourself to admit that this game is—”

“hat guy!” another voice pops up in the scenario, but rather than having his guard up higher, hat guy's shoulders seem to relax upon hearing your voice.

as you enter the scene, you immediately realize the situation. there's a look of dread in hat guy's eyes that shows his disagreement towards card games. “general mahamatra, pardon for the intrusion, but please do excuse hat guy and his… displeasure with tcg. i'm sure there are other skilled scholars who are more interested in playing a match with you.” you intervene, a nervous laugh at the end because despite this silly interaction, cyno still holds a high position and you know the power this man has.

cyno was about to respond, but sethos — the green-eyed desert guy — beats him to it, “apologies, my lady. the general here just wants a formidable opponent because apparently i don't play enough tcg.” sethos explains as he casually points his thumb at cyno, “i'm not interested to be your opponent.” hat guy coldly rejects.

“no! you will play tcg with me one da—” sethos covers his mouth that he almost stumbled backwards, they bicker among themselves.

“hey, yn! long time, no see!” you hear durin's little whisper, you assume he's hiding behind hat guy, a giggle passes your lips and the endearing thought. “hey, durin. i missed you!” for a moment, you reminisce the first time durin visited the real world — you met him them as he and hat guy relayed to you the tales of simulanka and all the shenanigans that occurred.

“anyways! hat guy, you know you'd be so cute with your hair tied up.” sethos grinned, the change in topic also brightened up his aura however it only dimmed hat guy's. he takes off hat guy's hat, now he's just guy, and his fingers swiftly grabs a portion of his midnight-hued hair and ties a little bun.

and the cherry on top, a bow.

“...tch.”

hat guy never had his hair tied, you had played with a few strands whenever he lays down on your lap, but that's the closest his hair ever got touched. mini durin struggles to hide his laughter at the sight of his best friend's angered face being ten times more adorable with the new hairstyle.

he's extra convinced that this is just another dream simulated by nahida.

“i wonder what you would look like with your hair braided.” you giggle, envisioning different styles on his jellyfish-like haircut. “whatever it is, don't.” hat guy rolls his eyes.

you, hat guy, and mini durin continue to walk to whoever knows where, your path has strayed away from the city but it's no issue when hat guy finds relief in not having to be jumped on by scholars.

along the way, laughter and banter were thrown back and forth. “don't pretend it's erased in history that you broke my favorite pen!” you nag him, “it was already cracked, it just happened to break apart in my hand!” he defends himself, this argument has been going on for months now, it's your personal grudge against him that you bring up whenever he tries to drag you down.

“it's raining!” durin points out as the rain loudly splatters on the ground, “oi!” hat guy yelps as you take his hat and hovers it over your heads. “c'mon it's big enough.” you reason out, he sighs and rolls his eyes, durin is in between you two as you walk to find a better shelter.

until a small meow catches your attention, as if on instinct, your eyes darts toward the sound's origin. it didn't take long to find a small cat inside a pot, wet in the rain. the little guy seemed to be alone with no owner or parent cat around.

and it didn't take another thought for hat guy to grab his hat and cover the white cat's head, leaving you and durin exposed to the rain, “i'll take you to the shelter. follow me if you want.” he says, but instead picks up the cat in his arms — talk about personal autonomy, no?

shortly, he returns to you and durin, the hat barely covering your group but settles with whatever his hat can provide. it's a wondrous sight, no words were spoken at this moment, even durin who enjoyed conversing let the serene silence overpower the rainfall.

and hat guy realizes that not a word had fallen off your lips about his birthday. you certainly had not forgotten, right?

suddenly, his chest feels empty, which is weird enough for he doesn't even possess a heart. a human heart. his ribs feel tight, as if clenching on nothing; he doesn't understand the anomaly taking place within his core, the cat meows and snuggles against his chest, serving as a temporary remedy for the internal ache.

sometimes you were infuriating. not for reasons that are shallow and certainly he doesn't wish for your demise; he finds you the cause of the berserk inside him, for whenever you two are within each other's parameters, suddenly he's at ease and for some reason that he time and time again fails to provide an answer for, troubled.

dear archons, hat guy could almost solve all of sumeru's political issues — if he dared to — but this predicament that involves you bears no fruition to his efforts in understanding the effect you have on him. the lack of an emotional organ within him feels more and more apparent when there's a rampant of feelings flowing in his blood.

is this what a heart is for?

“the sky's clearing up!” durin beams, flying forward. “don't fly too far, you don't know where you're going.” hat guy scolds the little dragon who muttered an apology and returns close to him. 

you settled in an abandoned hut, based on the nearby surroundings, it's safe to assume you're around the region in between avidya forest and vanarana. “are you hungry little guy?” durin converses with the lone cat that chooses to stay on hat guy's lap, rendering him immobile until the cat is satisfied with its rest.

“say, durin, do you know what today is?” you ask the dragon, he tilts his head in response, “hat day, is today a special day?” you softly smile at how closely tied durin is to hat guy, you've known him since the day he started as an akademiya student, you were together at the same table in the library. he wasn't the sociable type, he made that clear, but you were persistent to break into his personal bubble until you finally claim a spot in his vicinity.

“it's just a normal day.” hat guy rolls his eyes, but the slight tint of pink on his cheeks doesn't go unnoticed. for hat guy, you were like a cat that demands to be paid attention to, a ginger-colored one that he can not seem to predict. 

“really? the sun seems to be too bright just for today to be normal.” he's confused, were you about to break open the forest and have the entirety of sumeru to sing him a happy birthday or there's something else up your sleeve that he can't guess.

“is that an aranara?!” durin squeals upon the sight of a blue aranara walking towards the group, hat guy follows durin's line of sight and spots not just one or two, but a small group of aranaras… and origamis?

his brows furrowed in disbelief, “what's going on?” hat guy looks at you with a puzzled face, you want to snort at his expression because clearly he's trying to avoid his birthday.

and you were not about to let him disregard his day like that.

the army of aranara and origami surrounds hat guy, the aranara orients a necklace of origami flowers around his neck. their little squeals speak of their joyous sentiment for this moment, a moment that belongs to hat guy.

“happy birthday.”

hat guy is stuck in a trance when he finally hears you say it.

“happy birthday, hat guy!” durin exclaims, he's flipping in circles, finally releasing the words he desperately tried to hide since he saw him.

“happy birthday, blue nara!”

“happy birthday, hero of simulanka!”

hat guy puts his hand on his chest as the greetings continue to echo in his ears, is this what happiness feels like?

“thank you.” he simply responds, clearing his throat to regain his usual composure. 

“we have gifts for you!” you crouch down in front of him, a big smile on your face. you gesture the aranaras and paper squirrels to come forth, they carry boxes filled with secret stories whose main character is hat guy.

“i got one too!” durin flies down to sit beside hat guy, his own little gift in his embrace.

“why would you celebrate my birthday?” his voice falters as he lets the question fly past his lips, “because i care for you, hat guy. you're special to me.” you simply reply, hoping that it delivers the deeper meaning of his existence to your life.

you love him, you will forever do so.

hat guy hums, unsure how to reply when he's fighting his innermost turmoil of crystalflies. he resorts to opening the gifts instead, one box containing a hand-crafted paper doll of himself, the enraged expression has him instinctively mirroring the same look, “is this how you see me?” he scoffs, but they let him tell his rough comments and cold feedback as he continues his unboxing spree.

“i've got plenty of unusual stuff from you and you still haven't run out of ideas? even durin has his own contribution.” he sighs, his indigo orbs lingering on the gifts you prepared. the stack of tcg cards from cyno still in his possession.

“because you deserve to be reminded that you're loved and wanted.”

loved and wanted, huh?

hat guy quietly apologizes as he moves the cat off his lap, he leans down to you and his hands cup your cheeks. “last time i checked, you're one of the top rtawahist students, but i must refute your claim on that one.”

“then i'll defend my argument, the absence of a physical heart does not restrict your emotional intelligence and morale. your ribs may not house an organ, but your embrace has proven otherwise.”

you may not know the burden that he hides underneath his facade or the weights that made him believe that love is an outerworldly entity, but one thing you will attest to is the hat guy who knows how to love.

even if it takes years for hat guy to realize and admit that he loves, you will continue to be the one to assure him that it's alright.

for the love he yearns and continues to long for is the birthday gift you promise to give him every year. for as long as you live, and in every reincarnation, you will love hat guy.

hat guy covers durin's eyes as he leans down to collide his lips on yours. the crystalflies in his stomach explode, but it's soon replaced with fulfillment. maybe, he doesn't need a heartbeat to tell him that he can love when he's capable of choosing to love.

there's light in his life when you arrived that one afternoon asking what thesis he was working on, there was you who appeared to hold him when the akademiya felt suffocating, and there will always be you beside him who loves and teaches him love.

if the dendro archon is reading his mind right, he would like to say that he doesn't feel lonely now. he has you now. and even without a birthday cake, he'd like to make a wish: please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh i can recognize anywhere.

“it seems like you're the one who's looking forward to my birthday.”

[cressidagrey]

Such A Mystery - Part 8

Pairing: Max Verstappen x Colette Leclerc (Original Character)

Summary:

Max Verstappen fell in love at the ripe old age of 12 and never looked back.

Colette Leclerc really regrets posting that particular Taylor Swift Lyric to her private Instagram account, because it made George Russell go insane.  

The rest of the world has absolutely no idea that the Dutch Lion and Charles Leclerc’s twin sister have been a couple for 15 years and are expecting a baby. 

Warnings: 

Pregnancy, Mention of multiple miscarriages, Pregnancy complications, George Russell Bashing (he's probably really nice in real life but in this, he's the bad guy, sorry), Jos Verstappen, We have apparently now reached the time where I also bash Ferrari. I am sure they are super nice in real life too. They are not in this.

Author Notes: Huge thanks to @llirawolf for holding my hand through this. Chapter 8 of...who knows.

Sadly, Max didn’t get to push George Russell of the track. Instead he accidentally hit Oscar in the first corner, which definitely hadn’t been on purpose…and also resulted in another penalty point and a 10 second penalty.

He was really done with this season.

At the same time, Charles carved his way up from P19 to P2 in which, what Max was pretty sure, could only be described as going on the warpath. Max was honestly just impressed at the speed with which Charles had managed to claw himself up to P2, and he would have applauded the effort if he hadn’t been so damn frustrated with everything else.

At this point, he just wanted to get the race done and over with and go home. He'd have time to worry about the penalty later - he just wanted to get this race over the finish line so that he could get a flight to Monaco and to Colette.

With that thought in mind, the last 12 laps went by in a blur, and it felt like no time at all until the checkered flag appeared.

For the first time all season, Max didn’t bother trying to push beyond the limit for an extra few seconds of time.Because quite frankly, it didn’t actually matter.

McLaren had gotten the constructor championship for the first time in 26 years.

"t may not have been the fastest race but I just wanted to say a big thank you for the season, guys. It hasn’t been easy at times, we still have quite a few things to improve on but we still won a world championship.  So, thank you for all the hard work the whole year," Max said into the radio. "Enjoy your time off and then we’ll go back at it again next year. Thank you, guys."

And now Max finally got to go home to Colette.

GP's voice came over the radio. "Get weighed and then we need you to come into the garage as quickly as possible, Max." 

Max furrowed his brows at the words. That was…odd. Why would he need to go to the garage immediately?

"Is everything alright?" he demanded. 

GP didn’t answer immediately, which did nothing to diminish Max’s worry.

His heart skipped a beat when the engineer finally responded, hesitantly. “Just come to the garage, please. Quickly.”He had wanted to apologise to Oscar about their incident in the first corner at the start, but that was quickly forgotten, at the tone in GP's voice.

It sounded alarmed and anxious, and that got Max's heart racing. Something was wrong, something was wrong, and he needed to get to the garage to find out what it was.

It took him an incredible amount of self-restraint not to outright bolt out of the car and charge into the garage, but he somehow managed to get out of the car, weighed himself in and all but dashed towards the garage.

"GP?!" he called out as he stormed into the garage. "What the hell is going on? What’s wrong? Why-"

GP was the one who dragged him into one of the side rooms, where no cameras would see the exchange that followed. There was Christian waiting, as well as his father. 

This wasn't good.

The sight was alarming enough to make him freeze. His heart seemed to skip a beat.

"I-” Max cut himself off, staring at the three men. "What- what's going on?"

"Colette is in labour," Christian answered. "Her brother Arthur texted me. Your pilot filed flight plans thirty minutes ago. There is a car waiting to take you to the airport."

For a moment, Max’s brain just froze altogether, his thoughts screeching to a halt.

His vision wavered as the words echoed in his head, and he had to reach out and grab a hold of the wall next to him as his legs tried to buckle.

He couldn’t have read those words right. There was no way - she had four more weeks. They had more time, Colette couldn’t be in labour.

But it was GP's voice that was cutting through the fog in his head. “Max.  Are you with us?”

Max had to take a deep breath, forcing his mind into action.

"Yeah," he heard himself croak out. The only thought in his mind was that he had to get to the airport. He had to get home as fast as he possibly could.

“We need to get Charles," he demanded. “I don’t care how you do it. I’ll pay whatever ridiculous fine the FIA demands. But if he finds out I left without him, he’s going to kill me.”

There was no doubt about that. 

Max was dimly aware that all three men were looking at him with varying levels of sympathy - but he didn’t care. He only had one thought in his mind, and that was getting to Colette as soon as goddamn possible.

"Gemma is getting him right now," Christian promised him. "I already talked with Ferrari...or screamed at them, that is more likely. So did Arthur apparently. I need to warn you though, the press is swarming outside, especially after your father's little interview," he said darkly.

"What interview?" Max asked, staring at his father. What interview were they talking about?!

"I talked to Sky News about your anger issues," his father said drily.

"Correction," GP snapped. "You told Sky News that Colette and Max are a couple and that their baby is due any day."

It took a moment for the words to sink in, and they were like a punch to the gut. His father had done what?

"You told the damn media she’s having our baby?" he exclaimed, staring at the older man. "Have you completely lost your mind?!"

"No, I merely said it’s due any day," Jos snapped. "Not that it's actually on the way. Calm down, I only said it because you need to stop denying that you two are an item, it’s getting ridiculous!"

Max honestly didn’t even know how to react to the words. Normally, he would’ve been furious right now. His father had just gone and announced their private life to the entire world. And if that wasn’t bad enough, the fact that Colette was currently in labour…

"He also said and I quote It took them long enough, they definitely practiced enough!" GP snapped, looking and sounding more furious than Max had ever seen him before. 

For a moment, Max almost choked and he whirled to his father, his eyes wide. "You-" the words got stuck in his throat. "We’ve been trying for nearly three years. Colette had two miscarriages!"

All of a sudden, the anger that had been boiling inside of Max just evaporated into thin air, leaving only cold, burning rage behind. He took a shuddering breath, his whole body trembling violently. "How. Dare. You," he spat. Even he was surprised how menacing it sounded, but he was also way beyond caring.

"You never said," his father said, nearly silently.

“Clearly I had a good reason,” Max bit out. “We lost two babies. And you are telling us that we took our time? How. Dare. You."

There was a flicker of something in his father’s eyes, which looked awfully similar to pain and regret, but Max was far too furious to care about some kind of guilt.

"You have no right-" he bit out, his voice trembling with anger, "No right to talk or say anything about-"

"It was already out anyway," his father defended himself.

The words made Max freeze again, and he slowly straightened, the cold fury rushing through his veins and making him feel lightheaded. He clenched his jaw, fighting to find the right words, even if he was pretty sure he was about to completely lose it.

“Another word. About her, about our baby. About either of them,” he snarled, his words low and dripping with venom. “ And I will have absolutely no problem with completely and permanently cutting you out of my life, vader.  You’ll be dead to me. To Colette. To our baby. Is. That. Clear? Colette is not something that we are going to negotiate about. It didn’t work when I was 15. It‘s not working now!"

Surprisingly enough, Jos didn’t reply. The only sound in the room was of Max’s ragged breathing.

He didn’t notice Christian’s worried glance in his direction, but GP’s low and quiet voice cut through his thoughts. "Max."

Max flinched, and he forced himself to get a grip. For a half a second, he couldn’t bring himself to turn to look at the people around him.

Finally, he straightened, forcing his legs to move and his mouth to form a response. “Yeah.”

“There is a car waiting. Go,” GP told him calmly. There really wasn’t any reason to linger, and if he were to say anything else, he was in serious risk of exploding.

Max took a deep breath and moved towards the door, the need to see Colette driving every thought out of his mind.

All the anger and adrenaline made it very easy to push through the hoard of reporters and journalists waiting just outside the garage, his mind laser focused.

There were cameras flashing and reporters shouting questions, but he ignored them all. His only priority was to get to Colette.

At the same time as his single-minded determination helped him to power through the throng of people and reach the car waiting for him, his mind was also whirling with a thousand different questions.

What happens if the baby came right now? What if something went wrong? What if-

***

Charles had known that something was wrong. But then...he had been having that feeling for days. Colette was feeling anxious and scared and angry and a thousand other things and Charles would have known that she was feeling that way, even if he hadn't texted her. 

They had always known if something was wrong with each other. They had always known what the other one was feeling.

That had always been their connection…He loved his brothers more than anything. He did. But they weren’t Colette. They weren’t his twin sister. 

Two lives, two halves of one whole. He would never feel complete without Colette. 

Charles could always tell if something was wrong with his twin. And for days now, something had been very, very wrong.

And still he had soldiered on. He had dragged his car from P19 up to P3. Just behind Carlos...two podiums for Ferrari but not enough to clinch the constructor's championship.

He had only done so because he had known that Colette was never gonna let him hear the end of it if he didn't do his very best.

Just like she had been with him during that Formula 2 race less than 48 hours after their father had died…and she had told him to get into that damn car and race in circles, she had done the same this time. 

And he had listened. 

Of course, he had. 

Still...he had never been more thankful that a Race was over than he was of this one. He was just happy that it was over. 

He followed along to the cooldown room on autopilot, Lando already, then Carlos following after him.

The absolute drama that went down there next...well, it simply started with a commotion. And screaming.

The next things they knew, there was Camilla, PR from Ferrari, in what could only be described as a screaming match with Gemma from Red Bull...with security following along as Gemma more or less threw herself into the cooldown room, completely ignoring what anybody else was telling her. 

Charles stared, utterly bewildered. What the hell was going on here? 

Why was Gemma here, literally shoving her way into the cooldown room and throwing herself at him, security struggling to stop her?

"He deserves to know!" Gemma snapped at Camilla. "You cannot keep this from him! This is about his family. We have tried to talk to Ferrari, you are either ignoring our calls or telling us that there is no way you'll tell him until after the interviews are done. What is wrong with you?"

“What the hell is going on?” Charles managed to finally find his voice. What was happening? What were they talking about? What the hell was wrong with Ferrari? "Someone, anyone, give me an answer!"

The only person who seemed willing to answer was Camilla and the look on her face was completely unapologetic. "You are a Ferrari driver," she said simply, as if that explained everything. "There is nothing that goes on with you while you are driving that takes precedence over your job."

"He isn't driving now," Gemma snapped, as she turned towards Charles. "Your sister is in the hospital. Max's pilot has filed flight plans. There is a car waiting to bring you both back to Monaco."

That got Charles' attention like nothing else would have done. In one second, he went from baffled confusion to absolute shock and alarm. His eyes widened, his heart beginning to pound as adrenaline and fear suddenly flooded his system. "She's...she's...what?" he asked hoarsely.

"In the hospital," Gemma repeated, giving him a pointed look.

"What happened?" Lando demanded suddenly. "Is Colette alright?"

"Is something wrong with the baby?" Charles choked out. 

With the baby. No. No. Not again. 

He had seen his sister utterly heartbroken twice about her two miscarriages. 

And these two miscarriages had been horrible. Heartbreaking. Devastating. Had destroyed her. But they hadn't been...They had been early on in the pregnancy.

They hadn't been after Colette had spent months pouring over baby name books and buying things for the nursery, after she had let him feel the baby kick in her belly...after...after all of this...

"What baby?!" Lando blurted out suddenly, but Charles ignroe that. 

"Max's pilot has filed flight plans. There is a car waiting to bring you both back to Monaco," Gemma repeated. "But you need to come with me now, Charles.” 

"He's not coming with you!" Camilla snapped. "Charles has media obligations!"

"I don't give a fuck about my media obligations!" Charles snapped back at her. He was literally shaking with the sheer strength of his anger. "My sister is in the hospital! I am going. Now."

Charles didn't wait for a response. He was already headed towards the exit, his blood thundering in his ears as confusion and fear and anger raced through his body. The only thing that was going through his head was Colette was in the hospital, Colette was in the hospital, Colette. was. In. The. Hospital.

If anybody tried to stop him now, he would have absolutely no problem going straight through them.

"You are a Ferrari driver," Camilla growled.

"And," Charles snarled, whipping around to look at her. "I am a brother. And a twin. And she is my other half. She is in the damn hospital, and you tried to keep that information from me. What, did Ferrari think that I just wouldn’t care?"

That seemed to render her speechless for a moment, but only for a moment. "We believed," she said coldly, with an undercurrent of anger beneath. "That you would remain professional and focus on your job as you were paid to do so."

"Are you serious?" Lando snapped at that moment. "His sister is in the hospital and you want him to do interviews!?"

"I was not speaking to you, Norris," Camilla said, in a voice that could freeze water. "It is none of your business. We are trying to deal with a delicate public relations issue here that you don't understand."

"I have sisters too," Carlos snapped. "And you better believe that if one of them was in the hospital, I would be there too." 

"Go," Lando told Charles at that moment. "GO."

Charles didn't need to be told twice. He was already halfway out the door. There was only one thought on his mind. Colette.

[ccsainzleclerc5516]

That’s Not What Friends Do (part 1)

Pairing: Lando Norris x reader

Warnings: smut, cheating

Request: Lando and the Reader have been best friends since they were babies. Lando has been in love with the Reader since he was a teenager, which is why he has never had a serious relationship. He has flings with girls, but nothing serious. On the other hand, the Reader has been in love with Lando for the past one to two years but thinks he doesn't like her that way, which is why she doesn't propose. Lando is very protective of the Reader, and the Reader is equally protective of Lando.... She knows he sleeps around and is protective of him in a way that she advises him to be smart about who he sleeps with and to stay out of the headlines for anything other than racing. The story starts after the Brazil race, where Lando had a tough time and went without sleep for 24-48 hours. When he returns from São Paulo, he finds the Reader already there, ready to comfort him after a bad race. - I changed it up a bit adding Charles into the story, but I hope you still like it!

"Oh, yes, yes, yes-ah.." The girl moans breathlessly into the pillow as Lando animalistically continues pounding her from behind.

"Just like that, Lando, give it to me" She continues talking even though Lando hates hearing it.

He hates the way his name sounds coming from her lips. He also hates that he's giving her what she wants. And most of all, he hates the fact that once again he's fucking someone else, imagining it washer.

Once he closes his eyes and thinks of your innocent face, it sends him over the edge, he twitches pulling out his cock and cumming inside the condom. "Fuck.." He moans throwing his head back as his thighs shake.

"You didn't have to pull out, you know? You have a condom on anyway" The girl smirks turning to look at him and trying to pull him down to her.

Lando doesn't say anything, he raises his eyebrow at her, barely keeping himself from rolling his eyes at her stupid comment.

He's been with so many girls he can't even count them, but even when he's drunk out of his mind, protection is a must have. He's not fucking around when it comes to that, not when he doesn't even know half of those girls' names. Nor is he interested in their names. All he cares about is emptying himself, giving himself a short-term pleasure and maybe just maybe running into someone who is at least slightly similar to her.

"You're not gonna stay?" The girl asks when he gets up from the bed and starts pulling his pants up.

"No, sorry, I gotta go" With curt, almost no explanations, he always leaves minutes after he finishes. Not that he's proud of it, but to be honest, he doesn't care either.

On the other hand, y/n doesn't spend her free nights the way Lando does. She doesn't fuck around with guys to keep her mind off Lando because she knows that's impossible in a way.

Although she spends some of her evenings wishing she had never seen that article a year and a half ago. It was a perfectly normal Monday night, the day after the race, when after a long flight she finally lay down on her couch, snuggled under the blanket and started scrolling through her phone. At one point, her best friend Ruby sent her an article titled "Friends"? and a picture of y/n and Lando that y/n hasn't stopped thinking about ever since.

The picture captured the moment when, after the race, Lando had both arms tightly wrapped around y/n and was kissing her temple with his eyes closed.

At first it seemed like an ordinary picture, I mean it wasn't the first time they shared a close moment like that before. After all they're friends? Friends do that, right? But the longer y/n stared at it, the more it awakened something in her that hadn't been there before.

When she found herself thinking about Lando and herself at night to fall asleep, she realized she was in trouble because she knew she was in love with her best friend. But since she also knew that the night she was staring at their picture, he was fucking some girl because he himself had told her he was meeting her that night, y/n knew she had to suppress her feelings.

That's where y/n had a little help named Charles.

"Where were you?"

Y/n startles almost screaming when she walks into her apartment and turns on the light revealing Lando on her couch.

"Oh my God, Lando!!" She said, barely able to catch her breath as she held her hand over her heart thinking it would jump out at any second. "You scared the shit out of me! How did you get in here?"

"You gave me the key?"

"I did, but to use it in case of emergency only!"

"You not answering my calls is an emergency" He says and you roll your eyes at him as you take off your shoes. "So?"

"So?" You mimic him.

"Where were you?"

"I was" You sigh. "On a date."

"You were on a date?" He asked a little panicked, following you like a puppy into the kitchen where you had gone.

"Mhm" You mumble, avoiding his gaze. "Ready to conquer Brazil?" You ask trying to change the subject.

"Who were you on a date with?" He asks not dropping it.

"Can we please not talk about it?" You sigh. You really had no intention of telling him anytime soon that you were seeing Charles. You knew Lando was never much of a fan of Charles. Although the reason for that was never clear to you, Lando had actually seen the way Charles secretly looked at you on a couple of occasions, and he confirmed his suspicions when Carlos told him that Charles had said he wanted to get to know you better.

"Why not? Since when am I not allowed to know who you're seeing?"

"Oh please, as if you tell me about every girl you see"

"Well..that's n-not the same"

"Oh really? And by the way, the other day Instagram was full of you and some blonde at a club again. I could see how drunk you were through the picture, you know?" You've scolded him for the umpteenth time already. "You really should be more careful who you associate yourself with, it's getting out of hand"

Lando remained silent because he knew you were right and he hated that he knew you were always right.

"Lando, you know I'm only saying that because I don't want them to talk badly about you and play with your head..."

No one really knew Lando the way you did. After all, you've known each other since childhood, inseparable since you were little. Your relationship has always been one of a kind, both of you very protective of each other. For Lando, it was like he wasn't afraid to hurt anyone but you. You were something that cannot be touched.

"I know, but I don't want to talk about that either." He says. "Are you coming with me to Brazil?"

"No, I'm sorry, Lan. I have a project to finish. I have so much to do and so little time."

"So you have time to date but you don't have time to be there when I need you?"

"H-how can you even say that?" You were offended because that was far from the truth. If anyone was always there for Lando, it was you. You just didn't know he was saying this only out of jealousy and because he had a hard time accepting that you had someone in your life besides him.

"Let me guess, he'll be your moral support while you work on your project?"

Oh, if he only knew that the "moral support" he was talking about would be much closer to him than to you that weekend, he would surely lose his mind.

[sturnsbae]

SLEEPY - WILL SMITH

summary: will comes home from work to a very sleepy y/n passed out on the couch

—

within the last few days, your fatigue has been severe. you’ve fallen asleep hours before you usually do, and getting up in the mornings has become increasingly more challenging. this is a telltale sign that you’re getting sick.

will, your boyfriend of two years, has a game against calgary tonight. unfortunately, you’re far too ill to actually attend the game. of course, it broke your heart to tell your boyfriend that you wouldn’t be able to make it, but he was more than okay with you getting your rest rather than watching him chase a rubber puck for three hours.

you’re currently sat on the couch of your guys’ shared apartment while the game illuminates the dimly lit room. your eyelids become heavier as every line change occurs, but it eventually becomes too unbearable to fight. as you fall asleep, you’re cuddled into the fluffy blanket, along with being swallowed by wills boston college hoodie. you’re so knocked out, that you end up missing macklins goal during the second period, followed by everything else that happened after it.

will opens the door expecting you to be wide awake, but quickly slows his movements when he sees you sprawled out on the couch engulfed in his hoodie and a blanket. he chuckles to himself softly as he puts his hockey bag down by the door, careful not to wake you. he walks over to the couch and sits down next to you, gently moving hair out of your face.

“baby?” he quietly asks.

you stir awake and rub your eyes softly, stretching your limbs with a loud groan as you sit up. “oh, will? what time is it? i thought you should be-“ you quickly come to the realization that you had fallen asleep. “oh,” you say.

will chuckles with a grin, “yeah, you fell asleep.”

“i’m so sorry…” you mutter, fixing your hair and adjusting his hoodie.

“you’re sorry? what are you apologizing for, y/n?” will asks, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

“missing your game. i feel awful! it’s enough that i didn’t even physically go, and then i still end up missing the entire thing!”

“y/n, please don’t apologize. honestly, you missed nothing. it was an embarrassing loss anyways.” will says, and you can hear the pain in his voice.

“oh baby i’m so sorry.” you sigh, wrapping him in a hug. he chuckles, the vibration of his laughter against your body makes you smile. despite being half asleep, he still never fails to make you happy.

“are you feeling any better?” your concerned boyfriend asks.

“i’m just still tired, i’m sure i’ll wake up sick tomorrow” you laugh, which makes him pout.

“y/n, you should really get to bed baby…” he says, making you sigh. you know he’s right, but you also wanna stay up and talk to him… but he knows you too well and immediately stops this thought. “y/n, we can talk in bed. cmon, i’ll carry you.”

he swoops you up bridal style, letting the blanket fall beneath his feet as he walks you to the bedroom. he gently places you down on the bed and plants a kiss on the crown of your head. “i’m gonna shower really quickly, but don’t stay up. go to bed, it’s okay.” you nod, but you both know you’re gonna force yourself to stay awake until he comes back. and that’s exactly what you do.

will exits the bathroom about ten minutes later and shuts off the light, crawling into bed with you. you immediately snuggle into him as his arm wraps around you, the smell of his body wash filling your senses. “how badly did you guys lose?” you ask softly.

“3-1, mack got the only goal” he replies. you smile at the thought that will and mack must’ve been so happy about it.

“tell him i say congrats, but maybe leave out the part where i fell asleep,” you joke, making will laugh. you two talk for another 5 minutes or so before you drift off into sleep again, leaving will with a smile on his face and a sleepy girlfriend on his arm.

[mattsobvimyfav]

neighbors (Matthew Sturniolo)

pt. 1

I slammed the door so hard I was sure the whole house shook. My heart was racing, and I could barely hear anything over the blood pounding in my ears. I turned to Charlie, who looked just as panicked as I felt.

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god,” she muttered, pacing back and forth, her hands gripping her hair. “What the fuck just happened? Why are they here?”

“I don’t know!” I snapped, my voice shaky as I grabbed her arm. “I feel like I just saw a fucking ghost!”

Without waiting for her to respond, I bolted up the stairs, dragging Charlie with me. We didn’t stop until we were in my bedroom, and I slammed that door shut too, locking it like I was trying to keep monsters out.

“Are we hallucinating?” Charlie asked, flopping onto my bed and staring at the ceiling. “Like, maybe we’re overtired or jet-lagged or something?”

“Nope,” I said, sinking to the floor with my back pressed against the door. “That was real. Way too real.”

She sat up suddenly, her eyes wide. “This has to be a fucking joke right.”

“Yes!,” I interrupted quickly, shaking my head. “I don't know how, but i'm picking delusions over everything”

“What are the fucking odds?” Charlie asked, throwing her hands in the air.

My phone buzzed on the nightstand, making us both jump.

“Don’t answer it,” Charlie said immediately.

“I wasn’t going to!” I snapped, crawling across the floor to grab it. I sighed as I saw my dads name on the screen.

“What do we do?” Charlie whispered.

“I don’t know!” I groaned, tossing the phone onto the bed. “I thought we left this behind us. Four years, Charlie. Four fucking years of silence, and now they're just at our door?”

Charlie flopped back onto the bed and covered her face with a pillow. “We came here to start over, I mean I knew there was a chance but come on we haven't even been here 24 hours. and LA is huge.”

She wasn’t wrong. It wasn’t supposed to include the ghosts of our past but we knew it was a possibility.

Another knock echoed through the house.

Charlie sat up, her eyes wide with panic. 

“It’s Matt.” Don't ask me how four years later I could still tell it was him just by the aggressive knocking.

We made our way down the stairs. I could feel the lump in my throat growing as I stared at the spot where I knew Matt was standing on the other side.

“I need to say something,” I said finally,

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Charlie warned, her voice muffled by the pillow she was clutching.

I grabbed the doorknob, my grip tightening as I took a deep breath. “No promises.”

I wasn’t ready for this—seeing them, hearing them, being around them again. But it didn’t look like the universe was giving me much of a choice.

I unlocked the door and swung it open, my heart pounding in my chest. All three of them were standing there—Matt, Nick, and Chris—and the sight of them hit me like a punch to the gut. I wanted to immediately throw up. They looked older, but the memories they brought back made me feel like I was eighteen all over again.

“I’m going to be straight up with you,” I said, crossing my arms and staring them down. My voice was steady, but it took every ounce of strength I had to keep it that way. “I want nothing to do with you guys still. Sure, we can do the friendly neighbor wave if we see each other outside, but please leave us alone. It took a long time to move on from you people, but we did it. So can you agree to that?”

For a moment, they all just stared at me, and the silence was suffocating.

Matt’s jaw tightened, and his expression darkened. He looked like he was about to explode. “That’s it?” he snapped. “You’re not even going to try to have a conversation? After everything—”

I cut him off before he could finish. “After everything is exactly why I don’t want to talk. I’m not doing this, Matt.”

Nick stepped forward, his hands raised like he was trying to keep the peace. “I get it,” he said quietly. His voice was soft, almost apologetic. “You don’t owe us anything. We won’t bother you.”

I nodded once, appreciating that he at least understood, but I couldn’t bring myself to say anything back.

Chris, though, was another story. He looked like he wanted to crumble right there on my porch. His eyes were glossy, and he was barely holding it together.

“Chris,” I said gently, but firmly. “Don’t.”

He opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, but no words came out. Instead, he just nodded, his head hanging low like he couldn’t even look at me anymore.

“Goodbye,” I said, stepping back and gripping the edge of the door.

Matt glared at me, his fists clenched at his sides, but he didn’t say another word. Nick gave me a small, sad smile, and Chris… Chris just looked broken.

I closed the door before I could second-guess myself, locking it again for good measure. When I turned around, Charlie was standing at the top of the stairs, her arms wrapped around herself like she was bracing for impact.

“Well?” she asked hesitantly.

“They agreed,” I said, leaning back against the door. “At least, I think they did.”

“Do you think they’ll actually leave us alone?”

“I don’t know,” I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. “But I hope so.”

I trudged upstairs, my legs feeling heavier with every step.

“Well, that was a disaster,” she muttered, throwing herself onto my bed.

I sighed and leaned against the door. “I don’t even want to think about it anymore. Let’s just call it a night.”

She nodded, sitting up to grab her phone. “Yeah, good call. We’ve got a busy day tomorrow anyway.”

I managed a small smile and headed to the bathroom to wash up. By the time I came back, Charlie had already changed into her pajamas and was scrolling mindlessly on her phone. I did the same, slipping into a T-shirt and underwear, and climbing into bed.

We didn’t talk much after that. The weight of the evening hung heavy between us, but eventually, we both drifted off, the stress of the day finally catching up to us.

The next morning, I woke to the sound of my alarm blaring from under my pillow. Groaning, I smacked the snooze button and sat up, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

“Time to adult,” Charlie mumbled groggily from her makeshift bed on the floor.

“Yup,” I replied, stretching before sliding out of bed.

We both moved like zombies as we rummaged through our suitcases, pulling out shorts, tank tops, and sneakers. It felt surreal, living out of luggage in our new house, but today was the first step toward making it feel like home.

Once we were dressed, I threw my hair into a messy bun, and Charlie braided hers. After a quick debate over whether we needed coffee or breakfast first, we grabbed our bags and headed downstairs.

“Ready to spend way too much money on fucking furniture?” I joked, slinging my tote over my shoulder.

Charlie laughed. “Oh, absolutely. Let’s make bad financial decisions.”

With that, we headed out the door, determined to turn our empty house into a home.

Charlie and I spent the entire morning driving from one furniture store to another, armed with a notebook, our phones, and an ambitious list of everything we needed for the house. It was overwhelming, but in the best way.

First stop: beds. We wandered through aisles of mattresses, testing them out by flopping onto each one like children.

“This one’s too soft,” Charlie said, sinking into a plush mattress like quicksand.

I laughed, bouncing on the edge of a firmer one. “This one feels like sleeping on a rock.”

Eventually, we both settled on medium-firm queen mattresses, each picking out sleek platform bed frames to go with them. Delivery was arranged for later in the day, and we left the store feeling accomplished.

Next, we tackled the living room. Finding a couch was no easy task; we debated over colors, fabrics, and styles for nearly an hour.

“Gray is practical, but boring,” Charlie argued, running her hand over a plush sectional.

“Yeah, but white will be a nightmare to clean,” I countered, pointing at a gorgeous cream-colored sofa.

After much deliberation, we compromised on a deep navy-blue sectional with matching throw pillows. It was stylish but durable, and more importantly, it was in stock for delivery.

For the dining room, we agreed on a rustic wood table that could seat six, just in case we had company. We added sleek black chairs to modernize the look and splurged on a statement light fixture shaped like intertwined gold rings.

Decor shopping was the most fun. We wandered through aisles of wall art, throw blankets, lamps, and knick-knacks, tossing anything we loved into the cart. Charlie insisted on a funky cactus-shaped lamp for her room, while I fell in love with a vintage-style gold mirror for the entryway.

By the end of the day, we had a truckload of smaller items packed into the U-Haul we’d rented for the week. The larger pieces beds, couches, and the dining set were delivered earlier in the day. 

As I pulled into the driveway, Charlie let out a sigh of relief. “I don’t want to step foot in another furniture store for at least a month.”

“Same,” I agreed, climbing out of the truck. “But hey, at least we’re one step closer to having a real home.”

Unloading the truck was a workout, but by the time we were done, the house was starting to feel less like a shell and more like ours.

After hours of unpacking boxes and assembling furniture, the house was starting to come together. Charlie was in the living room, arranging throw pillows on the new navy-blue sectional, while I wrestled with the gold mirror I’d bought for the entryway.

As I stepped back to admire my handiwork, a thought struck me. “Wait,” I said, turning to Charlie. “We forgot TVs.”

Charlie froze, a pillow still in her hands. “Oh my god, you’re right. How did we miss that?”

I groaned, rubbing my temples. “We can’t live without TVs. What are we supposed to do, stare at the wall all night?”

Charlie laughed, tossing the pillow onto the couch. “Okay, let’s take a break. I’m starving anyway. Dinner first, then Best Buy?”

“Deal,” I said, already grabbing my purse.

We decided on a small Mexican place nearby, where we devoured tacos and chips with queso, brainstorming where to put the TVs in the house.

“We’ll need one in the living room, obviously,” Charlie said, wiping her hands on a napkin.

“And one for my room,” I added.

“Same,” Charlie agreed.

After dinner, we headed to Best Buy. The bright lights and endless rows of electronics made my tired brain feel even more overwhelmed, but we quickly found the TV section.

“This one’s huge,” Charlie said, pointing at an 85-inch screen.

“Absolutely not,” I laughed. “We’re not turning the living room into a movie theater.”

After some back and forth, we settled on a 75-inch TV for the living room and two 50-inch TVs for our bedrooms. As we were checking out, something else caught my eye—a sleek silver macbook pro that seemed perfect for editing videos.

“I’ve been needing a new laptop anyway, I've had the same one since senior year… of highschool” I said, holding it up for Charlie to see.

“Do it,” she encouraged.

With our cart loaded, we left Best Buy and made our way back to the house.

“This is starting to feel like a full-time job,” I joked as we unloaded the car.

Charlie laughed. “But it’ll be worth it when we’re sitting in our perfectly decorated house, watching our perfectly mounted TVs.”

“True,” I said, smiling. “Now let’s get to work.”

Charlie and I stood in the driveway, glaring at the enormous box containing the 75-inch TV. It was heavier than it looked, and we had already tried—and failed—to maneuver it into the house twice.

“This thing is impossible,” Charlie groaned, wiping her forehead with the back of her hand.

“I didn’t think we’d need a forklift just to get a TV inside,” I muttered, trying to catch my breath.

As we were about to attempt another lift, I heard a car door close. Looking up, I saw Nick stepping out of an Uber in front of the house next door. His gaze landed on us immediately, and I saw his eyebrows rise in amusement.

“Need some help?” he called, walking toward us with his hands shoved in his hoodie pockets.

Charlie and I froze.

“Pros and cons?” I whispered to her.

Charlie nodded, leaning closer. “Pro: We get the TV inside without breaking it or ourselves. Con: We owe him for helping, and this might be the start of the interactions we’re trying to avoid.”

“Another pro,” I added quietly, “it’s Nick. Not Matt or Chris.”

“True,” Charlie muttered, weighing it over in her head.

“Okay,” I said through clenched teeth, turning to Nick. “If you’re offering…”

Nick smirked, walking up to us. “I am. Don’t worry, I won’t charge you.”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Just get it over with.”

Nick crouched, lifting one end of the box with ease. “Wow, you two really thought you could handle this on your own?”

“Just shut up and lift,” I snapped, grabbing the other end.

With his help, we managed to get the TV inside in record time, placing it carefully in the living room. Nick dusted his hands off, grinning. “Anything else you need help with, or can I call this my good deed for the day?”

“Nope, we’re good,” Charlie said quickly, practically shoving him toward the door.

“Thanks,” I muttered reluctantly.

Nick smirked again but didn’t push it. “Anytime, neighbors.” With that, he walked out, shutting the door behind him.

As soon as he was gone, Charlie and I exchanged a look.

“Never again,” she said firmly.

“Agreed,” I replied. “But…at least the TV’s inside.”

I stood on my bed, carefully pinning string lights along the edges of the ceiling. The soft glow they cast was already making the room feel more like mine, even though there were still half-unpacked boxes scattered around. I stepped back, admiring my handiwork, when Charlie barged in without knocking, holding a bottle of water and looking exhausted.

“Okay, interior designer, I think it’s time to call it a night,” she said, plopping down onto my half-made bed.

I glanced at my phone. It was nearly midnight. “I just need to finish this corner,” I replied, pointing at the last stretch of wall.

“Y/N,” Charlie said with a laugh, “you’ve been at this all day. And we still need to go car shopping tomorrow.”

I sighed, sitting down on the bed next to her. “You’re right. But I want it to be perfect.”

“It will be. And besides,” she added with a smirk, “we’re vlogging the car shopping tomorrow. Can’t look sleep-deprived for our subscribers.”

I groaned, lying back on the bed. “Fine, fine. I’ll stop for tonight.”

Charlie stood up, stretching her arms. “Good. Now, let’s get some sleep before we embarrass ourselves trying to pick out cars on four hours of rest.”

I laughed, following her to the door. “That’s probably smart. Night, Charlie.”

“Night, Y/N,” she said, heading to her room.

I turned back, taking one last look at the lights. They weren’t perfect yet, but they’d do for tonight.

Charlie and I stood outside a sleek, glassy dealership with the LA sun shining behind us. I held the camera, while Charlie grinned and waved dramatically.

“Good morning, everyone!” Charlie cheered. “Welcome back to our channel! Today’s a huge day because—drumroll, please—we’re car shopping!”

I spun the camera to face me. “We’ve been dreaming about this for so long, and honestly, we couldn’t do any of this without you guys. So seriously, thank you for supporting us and making this possible. We love you!”

Charlie leaned in, nodding with a big smile. “Now let’s go spend our life savings!”

The camera cut to us inside a brightly lit Jeep dealership. Charlie was practically bouncing on her feet as a salesman led us to a lineup of Jeeps.

“This is it,” Charlie said, her eyes locked on a bright yellow Jeep Wrangler. “This is the one. I can feel it in my soul.”

I laughed, “You’re not even going to look at the others?”

She shot me a look. “What others? Nothing can top this beauty.” She turned to the camera. “Everyone say hello to my future car!”

“This is amazing,” she said, giggling. We were flying down the Los Angeles highway test driving her jeep.

Back at the dealership, I filmed her signing the paperwork, flashing the camera a thumbs-up.

“This is insane,” Charlie said, “Thank you guys so much for making this possible. You’ve literally changed our lives!”

The next scene showed us at a luxury dealership, me sitting in a sleek SUV. “Okay, this one’s nice,” I said, panning the camera to show the interior. “But it just doesn’t feel… right.”

Charlie filmed me this time, catching my indecision as I walked between several cars. “Y/N’s being picky,” she whispered into the camera, smirking.

“I’m not being picky!” I protested, pointing at her. “I’m being thorough!”

Finally, we arrived at the Ford dealership. The camera panned to a line of Broncos, and my eyes immediately lit up.

“This one,” I said, walking toward a forest green Ford Bronco. “This is the one.”

Charlie zoomed in on me running my hands over the hood. “You’re in love.”

“Absolutely,” I said, laughing. “Do you see this color? It’s perfect.”

“This feels so good to drive,” I said, grinning at the camera. 

The camera showed me holding the keys, looking slightly overwhelmed but excited. “I can’t believe this is actually happening,” I said, looking into the lens. “Seriously, thank you all so much. None of this would be possible without you.”

Charlie popped into frame, throwing an arm around me. “Big day for the besties!”

We stood in the dealership parking lot.

“This has been such a crazy day,” I said. “But we are officially car owners!”

Charlie bounced around me. “We’re going to have so many adventures in these things, and we can’t wait to bring you all along with us.”

“Don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe,” I added. “And tell us—what’s your dream car? Maybe we’ll manifest it for you.”

“Thanks for watching!” Charlie said, blowing a kiss to the camera.

Charlie and I were both drained from everything, but it felt so good to see the progress. For now, we were done moving furniture, and it felt like we were finally allowed to just relax for a bit.

We ended up in the living room, sitting on the couch in front of the TV. I had my laptop on my lap, working through some edits for the next vlog. Charlie was just chilling next to me, scrolling through her phone and half-watching a Brittany Broski podcast. We both needed a break.

“Hey, you think we should just call it a night after this?” Charlie asked, her voice a little quieter now that we were finally winding down. “We can actually sleep in tomorrow”

“Yeah, I agree,” I said, clicking through some of the footage I’d been editing. “We still have to go pick up the cars on Friday, too, so I guess we can finish everything tomorrow and take it easy tonight.”

Charlie nodded, letting out a tired sigh. “It feels so good to have everything coming together, though.”

We sat in comfortable silence for a while, the podcast playing in the background, and I kept editing. My mind was already thinking about what the next few days would bring. We’d pick up our new cars, drop off the last of the U-Haul stuff, and then we could officially call this place home.

After what felt like hours of scrolling and editing, I finally closed my laptop and leaned back into the couch, my body feeling heavy from exhaustion. “Okay, that’s enough work for today. Let’s enjoy the rest of the night.”

Charlie smiled and stretched, kicking her legs up on the coffee table. “Agreed. Let’s just enjoy some time to relax.”

We turned the volume up a bit, laughing at something Brittany said on the podcast.

As Charlie and I relaxed on the couch, the podcast still playing in the background, my mind couldn’t help but wander. Thoughts of Matt flooded my head. I hadn’t really let myself think about him much since seeing him a couple days ago, but now that we were finally settling into the house and things were calming down, he was creeping back into my mind.

I tried to focus on the podcast in front of me, but I couldn’t shake it. The memories of the way we used to be, how everything went down, the way things ended—it all kept replaying in my head.

Without thinking, I grabbed my phone and unlocked it, the screen lighting up in front of me. My thumb hovered over the TikTok app for a moment before I tapped it open. I knew I shouldn’t, but I found myself unblocking Matt’s profile.

I scrolled through his posts, my heart hammering in my chest with each video I saw. Then, I froze. There, on his arm, was a tattoo of a key—engraved with our old dorm number. The same one we had shared in those months of college. The same number that held so many memories, the room he left me in. My stomach turned. Seeing it now felt like a knife twisting in my gut.

I kept scrolling, trying to ignore the feeling creeping up my throat, but then something else caught my eye. His most recent TikTok. Posted one day ago, The sound playing  “I haven’t seen you in a while, you know I miss you, babe. When you hear this song, feel flattered it’s about your face and how I miss it.” The words hit me like a ton of bricks, and for a second, my heart dropped into my stomach. It was like he was singing directly to me. The weight of it was too much.

I was snapped out of my thoughts when my phone buzzed in my hand. I looked, and it was my boyfriend Leonard.

“Want to FaceTime?”

I stared at the message for a moment, trying to calm my racing thoughts. I couldn’t stay stuck on Matt. Not now, not when I had someone like Leo. I quickly typed back, a bit more quickly than I meant to.

“Yeah, sure. One sec.”

I took a deep breath and silenced my phone before looking over at Charlie. She was busy scrolling through her own feed, completely oblivious to the mess going on in my head.

I felt a twinge of guilt for letting Matt back in, even in my thoughts, but I couldn’t stop myself.

But for now, I pushed it aside, grabbed my phone, and clicked the FaceTime button for Leo.

tag-

@tbfaptbfae @ch0llies @2muchofaslvt @rockstarchr1s @simply-a-simper @mattscore @watercolorskyy @urfungi @sturnsvelocity @mattsturnii @christmastreecake @izzylovesmatt @larnieboox88

[vaguely-concerned]

do you ever think about how, when we get lucanis' ossuary mind note on what he was thinking during the fireplace scene at the end of his recruitment mission... what's implied to be his instinctive internal reaction as he's saying "you'd have to kill me" out loud sure isn't 'and I don't want to die'. it's '(and spite would die)'. do you think spite's gremlin-y candle-hungering give-me-FIRE! >:D presence has maybe saved that guy's life even more times and in more ways than are immediately obvious at a glance. do you ever. cry.

it's also very. him that the thing that would stay his hand on killing himself partially might be that he just isn't willing to visit the same cruelty or harm on spite as zara, even when accepting his passenger spirit as collateral damage would at least offer a chance to put an end to his own pain, which at that point he seems unable to see any other way of truly escaping or find real relief from than to die. there's so much resentment and fear and other understandable fraught emotions in spite and lucanis' relationship early on, but it's just as clear that deep down lucanis conceptualizes spite as fundamentally innocent in what's happened here -- perhaps, indeed, more innocent than he manages to conceptualize himself until someone else can help him get in there and start to untangle it with him. he's protective of spite in some subtle ways right from the start, taking pains to point out several times on the jog through the ossuary that the spirits here were just as much victims in what was done to them as anyone else. when spite acts out during the fireplace scene... how much of lucanis brushing it off the way he does is about the '*actively bleeding from the eyes* don't worry about me' avoidant side of it all, and how much is him trying to shelter spite from the eyes of people he does not know well enough yet to predict how they’ll react in response — towards himself or spite. (additional idea to really bring on the heartache: do you think he has maybe intervened in pretty much the same way between illario and caterina over the years and that’s how he does it so smoothly and automatically; it’s basically psychological muscle memory. Haha. ow.) 

Between that and the pretty consistent language he uses that frames spite as child-like, even when he means that in frustration/enfant terrible flavoured terms lol, you get the sense that regardless of how much Lucanis is aware of this on the surface, there is a deep instinctive protectiveness in him for spite. I think that even comes across in the scene where lucanis tells you he’ll continue to pursue a way to separate him and spite on the minrathous route. So I was kind of picking up on/working with that already subconsciously, but when I found that note it hit me like a sledgehammer that clearly in some part at least, the reason lucanis is still here is that he knows now that spite would die with him and doesn’t find that price acceptable. Spite thinks that lucanis mentally locking himself in his (torture :() room and refusing to speak to him is an act of rejection or trickery, but to my eyes taken with everything else we know about how lucanis’ brain tends to work… as much as it’s an expression of avoidance and fear and overwhelm and trying to get away from the voice pushing him towards action when the mere prospect of action fills you with despair to even contemplate (“There’s nowhere to go”), I think it’s also a mark of lucanis’ affection and protectiveness of spite. The guards along the way make it very clear that more so than to keep the outside world from coming in, this place is for protecting people from what might break out. 

And that’s why I think this is also such a good case study to look at lucanis' internal freeze logic and why it has been so adaptive for him up until now when faced with completely impossible emotional situations to which there are no good answers or causes of actions available, even though it's inherently and unavoidably one of those 'what's worse, the medicine or the disease' solutions a brain cooks up. lucanis by the point of inner demons is facing this conundrum: 1) I can't live like this, it hurts too much. I've been in pain so long I’ve got screams where my blood should be and it just keeps getting louder, and nothing really touches or helps that. 2) I can't die to escape this, because that would also kill spite (and also I've got a job to do I guess *working 9-5 slowed with reverb and with underwater sound distortion effects is playing in the background*). those are of course not actually his only options, but in the state he's in they are the only options he can conceive of. (that's not infrequently how it works, when the suffering is that intense and unrelenting. Nothing gives you tunnel sight quite like ‘I just need this to stop’ agony that has gone on long enough to add sheer soul exhaustion to the mix)

so what happens in the end? his freeze brain -- honed, I'm sure, through many long years of attachment trauma and abuse and loss for exactly this kind of 'uh-oh. Incoming FUBAR situation alert let’s go' -- kicks into action and makes him do nothing except what's externally required of him, so he can stay just functional and momentarily distracted by a plethora of avoidance behaviours enough to get through his daily life, if like not particularly happily so... and otherwise, as it were, locking himself in his room deep inside where nothing can touch him, where nothing gets in and nothing gets out, no harm allowed to either escape from within nor allowed to pierce through and get inside. numbness isn't actually a cure for that kind of suffering, but it's the closest thing you're likely to get with any immediacy and if you’re desperate enough by god you take those. It’s how he survived his upbringing, and it’s how he survived the ossuary — as he tells Davrin straight out, the trick to just shut down every part of his soul he can to get through intolerable pain, loss or helplessness. I don’t think that mechanism came to him in the ossuary the first time, I think that blueprint was deeply embedded in his neurons and went ‘ah. My time again. Not to worry I’m a bit of an expert at this I’ll get us through this yet (though you may not thank me for it by the end of it all)’. 

In that state he's unable to himself reach out and meaningfully ask for help (and also like... why would his inner world have any framework for that as even being on the table? this has never been an option before in his life, not in any safe or consistent way; he's fucked up the way he is because the same things/people that should have been and partially, comparatively, were the sources of help and relief and safety growing up are also the sources of pain and abuse, that eternal irreconcilable ambivalence, the double edged sword of unpredictable insecure attachment), but it also keeps him from doing anything uh drastic the other way too, on acting impulsively in ways that can’t be taken back. (that seems to be more illario’s role/dubious privilege in the family lol.) at many points in his life and especially growing up, freezing and going numb around the pain is as close to having control of anything as there was any hope of. 'harm will be inflicted on me unpredictably, but fuck you I don't have to truly feel it as long as I shut all this other stuff down as well, that's what I can control' nervous system logic. (it'll get you every time.) for what it’s worth I’m not so sure his nervous system judged that one incorrectly, I think that is the kind of rebellion you would have to cling to while being raised by someone like caterina, because look at illario if you want to know how much she respects and rewards anything more overt or active. (I mean, if you don’t succeed, at least. swing at Grandma Dellamorte you’d better not miss or you’ll meet that cane swinging at you the other way and she will not miss)

I say all this because I think it's as easy to demonize the freeze response as it is to demonize anger, to conceptualize it only as an obstructive force that, as bellara puts it, is one of the purest forms of a heart not seeming to want to let you be happy, or a mindless byproduct of trauma. But in my experience, the brain doesn’t generally come up with ‘stupid’ defense mechanisms. Even in the most maladaptive of coping mechanisms, there is at the core of it some part of you that once meant to save your life, no matter what trouble it is wreaking for you today. when you look at the setup of Lucanis’ soul, as it were, you can see the dual and in some ways genuinely noble and even tender qualities this response has in him, however misguided: it does imprison, but it also protects, and it means to protect; for all the pain along the way it has sheltered all the parts of his soul that are most precious and breakable, the most vulnerable parts that want to live and so so importantly love completely and freely. Lucanis thinks he’s protecting not even primarily himself but everyone he loves by staying where he is. (“It would be better for me to stay here than to risk losing you”) A child’s logic, to be sure, but logic of a kind and clearly one that caterina has encouraged in him because that’s a conception of love it’s been very useful for her for him to have. Freeze looks like utter hopelessness on the surface, but in some ways I think it’s the utmost triumph of hope — a spare and unrelenting winter that exists because it thinks one day spring might still come, and the things too precious and fragile to thrive in your life as it is now might bloom then. 

He is an adult now, and Caterina no longer controls his entire world, physically and emotionally. There’s finally room for other things, other people, himself, in his life, without everything having to defer to the gravitational force of what Caterina wants from him at the end of the day. And while I think her jumpscaring him with the First Talon position is partly her attempt to wrangle him back into the status quo of control she once had, I’m not sure it’s going to work quite the way she might hope — at least in the Treviso saved route, there are just too many fresh spring shoots in his life at that point that could grow into something new, it’s too late to trample all the saplings growing up through the cracks in time (and indeed some of them might also fight back). (The outlook on the Minrathous saved route is um. Perhaps less convincingly immediately hopeful to me and the prospect of actually getting around to healing further down the road, but I refuse to give up on him that’s my little guy and he’s above all incredibly smart and stubborn and not a quitter and all the rest of this still remains true beneath it all, just like. Give him a moment here.) His hopes and dreams have diversified while she had her back turned lmao he suddenly keeps them with so many more people than just her and Iillario now. She doesn’t hold the monopoly of meaning and connection in his life the way she used to. And whether out of love (you know. Hope is every man’s prerogative I suppose) at seeing him really happy for perhaps the first time or sheer pragmatism, I think she’s going to have to accept that and adapt her ways of doing things with him accordingly, or else have him drift even further away from her.

Spite is the urgent impatient voice that starts to break through to go ‘that moment is now it HAS to be now. We need to shake off the shackles and illusions and face what’s actually here so we can learn to properly live now, or this winter will starve us to death as surely as anything Zara could do to us’. And he is right! As crucial as this soul-starvation landscape has been in survival, it has clearly reached the end of its sustainability, you can’t survive permanently on frost alone. I just also want to recognize the credit Lucanis (and his fucked up but valiant nervous system <3 pour one out for a real one) also deserves for stubbornly holding on in any way he had to until Spite’s true escape project is even an option for either of them. Especially since Lucanis seems to harbour a lot of self-loathing and frustration over his own propensity for freeze — “You know him. You can open the door, but he won’t walk through it”  (still one of the saddest most painful things I’ve ever heard. In case you were wondering. He knows. He knows what he’s like, and he despairs of it, he thinks it means it’s his own fault he still feels like this. Augh.) The real point at the end of the day is not that spite saved lucanis or vice versa, but that as traumatic as it was to get there and against all cultural expectations, it is ultimately their enmeshed condition, their togetherness, that saved them both. (which, again, when you consider the cultural narrative of possession and spirits most andrastian nations are working with…what a radical conclusion to come away with haha. Not unprecedented at all, if you look at Wynne and her spirit, but on a deeper and more psychological plane than ever and even more impactful for it, to me.)

[empressdede]

The Lyon’s family Christmas

Summary: You lie to your mom and tell her that you have a boyfriend to bring home and begs your best friend Jon to come with you to meet your family.

Word count: 2.7k

Pairing: Jimmy x Y/N

A/N: Happy New Year and Happy Holidays; I am so so so so sorry that this is so late but I literally worked the entire holidays so this was the best day for me to release. I hope you guys enjoy!

P.S. Guess who’s officially back? 🙂💙

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

As often as this was a reoccurring issue, Y/N don’t know why she expected the conversation to take a different direction unlike the very worn out route her and her mother usually seemed to take.

“Do you remember Trent from church? I’ve heard the younger girls were saying he’s single now, and I was thinking about inviting him to our Christmas party. I think he makes for a nice boy, don’t you?" Her mom asked over the phone. And there it was, the same damn conversation causing Y/N to roll her eyes. Thank God her mother couldn’t see her.

Her mom never knew how to stay out of her business, always going out her way to try and set her up with damn near anybody because she thought it was the most terrifying fact that her daughter was single at 30 and have been for the last three years now.

But Y/N valued her peace more than anything, and all her past relationships have not always bought her peace, just heartache. So she wanted to be very cautious her next go round because she was being very serious when she told everyone she only had one more relationship in her. She just wished her mom understood that.

Y/N let out a sigh, "Mom, I haven’t seen Trent in forever. Do NOT invite that boy over for no foolishness. Plus, he’s really not my type." Y/N expressed which caused her mother her scoff.

"And since fuckin when was Trent not your type? I thought you were trying to get with a good man Y/N?" Her mother questioned.

Exactly.

Y/N let out a huff in annoyance, she knew way more than her mom and knew that Trent was definitely not the way go. But she didn’t know want her mom to think she was trying to push at the conversation so instead of being honest, Y/N does the first thing that comes to mind.

“I didn’t wanna tell you like this but Trent ain’t my type because I have a boyfriend now Ma.”

Y/N’s POV

The silence on the phone made me more nervous, why the fuck would I just say that?

“You got a boyfriend? Since when you found a boyfriend? And why haven’t you said anything about him?” The questions were leaving her mouth like quick fire, barely giving me anytime to answer her. But I did the best I could.

“I didn’t say anything because I wanted to make sure this was something worth bringing up.”

“Mmhmm, and how long you’ve been seeing this guy?” She asked

“Five months now, but we were friends before we started dating. I’ve been trying to take it slow.”

Another beat of silence took over the phone and for a second, I thought she knew I was spewing nothing but bullshit just to get her to shut up.

“Hmm, well baby you ain’t getting no younger. Tell this man I wanna meet him, invite him to the party and I’m not taking no for an answer.” She finally replied, but her response took me aback.

“Wait- mom..”

“Great! I’ll see you guys next weekend, Love you baby.” And with a quickness, she hung up in my face.

I was left amuck, staring at the phone in disbelief because what the fuck did I just do?

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

In retrospect, you didn’t really have anyone to ask but him. You weren’t comfortable asking anyone else but your best friend - who has yet to meet anyone in your family, which was perfect.

Who else would’ve agreed to do this for you?

“You want me to what?” He asked, choking on the fried rice he was eating prior.

Okay, so maybe it’s going to take a little bit of convincing.

“Please Jon, you’re the only person I can ask and I feel like we’re close enough; we could definitely pull it off.” You exclaimed, a small smile on your face; trying to be as persuasive as possible.

Jon was not amused, for all he knew this was another one of your tired ass pranks that he refused to fall for.

“So you want me to lie to your mom for Christmas?” he questioned, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Why don’t you just tell her you’re single? I’m sure it won’t be the end of the world.”

You sigh, shoulders sinking in a bit. “She wants to set me up with some guy I haven’t seen in years. You know how I get with guys Jon and she won’t stop until she sees me with someone.”

You turn to fully face him with pleading eyes. “C’mon Jon, I already told them I have a boyfriend, who else am I supposed to ask?”

Jon watched you with careful eyes, silent as if he was thinking it over. You couldn’t help but keep your gaze hopeful as you guts sat in your living room waiting for him to respond.

You knew it was a big favor to ask but you would owe him the world if he could help you get your mom off your back.

The silence that filled the room made goosebumps litter all over your skin and the anxiety that bubbled in your stomach made you want to throw up. Just when you were going to tell him to forget it, Jon cut you off.

“Fine, I’ll go. But if we do this, we need to get our story straight.”

And just like that, the planning began, and for the rest of dinner, the two of you sat and theorized on how their fake love story came into existence:

Two friends who danced around the possibility of what could be till one night Jon stepped up and asked you to dinner and you agreed and you guys have been taking it slow from that night on.

____________________________________________

Two days after that, Jon surprised Y/N with matching pajamas for this impromptu trip.

“What kind of couple would we be without matching PJs?” Jon had asked when he dropped them off.

It made Y/N more appreciative of the effort he seemed to put into it. Of course Jon would play the perfect gentleman like boyfriend, who else would’ve did this for her?

The night before they had to drive six hours to your mother‘s house, you two agreed that Jon spend the night. This instance wasn’t anything new, Jon was your best friend and he slept over before, but something within your dynamic changed.

It was as if they were falling into the role of a loving couple for each other instead of Y/N’s family.

Jon sat on the bed watching Y/N finish applying her night cream, getting ready for bed.

“Is there anyone I should expect to give me a hard time?” Jon asked and you shook your head.

“Honestly, my mom is probably going to push you to marry me.” You joked causing Jon to chuckle.

“Well, if that’s the case, you ready to be stuck with me for life babe?”

The nickname caused butterflies to flutter in your stomach.

“Babe?” You questioned and Jon sends you a shy smile.

“You gotta start the habit now. I can’t call you that when I get over there, what if I just randomly call you princess and you get flustered?” He slightly teased, and there was those damn butterflies again.

He was right though, they needed to fall into the role of a devoted couple because how else were they going to make everyone believe they were in love?

You playfully rolled your eyes, and respond back, “what if I call you, baby boy and you get flustered?”

At that, Jonathan laughs and shakes his head at you. “I thought you said you wanted it to be believable?”

“How is that not believable?” You questioned as you walks out of the bathroom and towards him where he sat on the bed.

You cupped Jon’s cheek and talked in a baby tone, “Who wouldn’t think you’re my baby boy?” Cooing softly in a joking manner.

Jon decided he’s had enough of your antics and stood up to tower over you. Your hand falling back to your side as you stare up at him, a small smirk slowly formed on his lips as he stared down at you.

“C’mon now, you really think anyone is going to see us and think you call me anything but Daddy?” He had lowered his tone on purpose, and just like that the playfullness was sucked out of the room.

Your breath hitched at the sound of his voice, taking note of how close you guys actually were. Why did he have to do all that?

You felt your cheeks warm up and you couldn’t be more thankful than you are now that your skin had a darker hue to it - but Jon didn’t need to see it to know that you were flustered because your silence gave it away.

His smirk grows, almost tauntingly as he stared down at you. Maybe he knew what he was doing to you or maybe he didn’t and just got a kick out of this, but you did not appreciate his little game.

“Isn’t that right princess?” Even though you knew that Jon was teasing, you couldn’t help the shiver that ran up your spine.

You squinted your eyes to glare at him, “You’re not funny Jonathan.” You hissed out but he only chuckled at you and shrugged his shoulders.

It was all fun and games until it was his turn.

Just to put the icing on the cake: Jon’s hand lifted up to cup your cheeks, “Say you love being daddy’s baby.” He cooed back causing you to smack your lips and slap his hand away.

Your nerves were still a little rattled as Jon doubled over in laughter.

“Ha. Ha. Ha. Very funny; you ready for bed or what? We got a long day ahead of us tomorrow and you’re driving.” You stated, walking past him for bed.

This is going to be the longest four days weekend ever.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The drive to your childhood home to Orlando FL, wasn’t so bad, three hours into it anyways.

When there was three more hours left to go, you became just a little restless, whining about how cramped your legs were starting to feel.

It went to show how much you really disliked long distant roadtrips.

“You don’t think you can wait another hour? We’re almost there.” Jon tried to negotiate but when he turned to face you and seen the pout on your lips, he let out a tired sigh and looked for the closest exit to stop at the nearest gas station.

You flashed him a cheeky smile, “Who knew you loved me so much?” You teased and he rolled his eyes letting you have this little moment because you guys had three more hours to kill and he’d rather you be in a good mood.

Another pro for stopping at the gas station is the opportunity to restock on snacks. After Jon filled up the tank, you both entered the gas station to look for whatever looked good enough to replenish you guys for the rest of the trip.

You both split ways to look for your favorite road trip snacks: Honey flavored chex mix, gummy worms and sunflower seeds since it was Jon’s preference.

Humming along to the Christmas song playing in the store, you went looking for Jon. Your eyes skimming through the isle looking for the tall idiot until your eyes fall on two figures: a girl laughing and holding herself up on Jon’s arm.

You raised an eyebrow at the scene, the feeling of annoyance swirled around in your stomach.

What the fuck was he doing?

You watched as the girl flash him another smile while fluttering her lashes in a flirting manner, and you couldn’t stop the scoff that left your lips. Your eyes squinted into a glare before an idea flashed in your mind.

It barely fully registered in your mind before you found yourself walking towards the two with the fakest smile on your face, “Babe did you find us some drinks?”

Jon turned to face you, a small smirk on his face cause he had watched you walk up to him.

The jealousy that burned in your eyes was very amusing and very apparent for him to see. If he didn’t know you well enough - he would’ve pushed his limit just a bit to see how far he could take it.

But knowing that they had three hours to kill before reaching Orlando, he’d rather not be in the car with an irritated Y/N, no matter how amusing it was to him.

Little did he know it was a little too late for that.

“Uh.. No, sorry babe. But we could go get it together.” He replied, and without bidding the girl goodbye, he locked arms with you to walk you towards the refrigerated section.

The girl watched with a frown on her face, as you guys walked away from her, and you couldn’t help but turn around to flash her a quick smile - almost taunting her before returning to face Jonathan, with the meanest glare, you could muster.

“I could’ve stayed in the car if you were going to be hot and fresh chasing hoes.” You gritted out once you were out of earshot.

Jon just chuckled softly, shaking his head at you while looking for your favorite drink. “She was just being nice.”

You roll your eyes again, “I’d rather you not insult my intelligence Jon.”

The frown was prominent on your face, and Jon couldn’t help the small smile that seemed almost glued to his face. You were cute he could definitely give you that.

A small chuckle emitted from him again as he walks closer to you to pull you into a hug. “You’re absolutely right princess, Daddy’s sorry.” He cooed, causing you to tense in his arms.

“Jon.” You grit out in a warning tone but he completely disregarded you. He lifted his left hand to tilt your head up to face him, and suddenly the air shifted between the two of you like it did back at your house.

“Jon.” You whispered out this time and he still chose to ignore you, his eyes flickering to your lips instead causing your breath to hitch.

“Jonathan.” You repeated, almost pleading with him and his eyes slowly traced up your face to lock eyes with you.

“You forgive me?” He rasps out; goosebumps littered all over your skin at the deepness of his voice.

“Y/N,” He muttered and you hummed to let him know you heard him. “Do. You. Forgive. Me?”

What in the world were you mad about again?

“Yeah.” You breathed out, hoping Jon with snap out of it, but he still didn’t let go of your chin.

“Good.” Was the only thing he stated before closing the gap between you guys. His lips pressed against yours and just for a second you both forget that this was supposed to be an act.

The butterflies that erupted in both of your stomach’s made the moment even more real for you guys. Your lips locked in a slow kiss, Jon’s hand slid down from your chin to grip behind your neck to keep you in place in deepen the kiss, just a little.

Your heartbeat filled your eardrums as blood rushed to your cheeks. When Jon finally pulled away, he seen how flushed you were, despite your darker skin tone.

He flashed you a small smile, “Was that okay?”

You nodded your head to assure him that it was more than okay. After the two of you finished up buying your snacks, you got in the car with childish grins and giggles slipping through your lips, both of you now in a way better mood than you were not less than 10 minutes ago.

You couldn’t help but secretly thank your mom for the invite to your family Christmas party because you don’t think you would’ve been here otherwise; and even though you’re pretty sure there is a conversation that needs to be had, maybe there was something to finally look forward to this holiday season.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Lmao this was lowkey eh, but I did my bestest😭🫶🏾 Thank you to those who like and read it!

As always please, like, comment and reblog if you feel like and lemme know how you feel.

Tagging the lovelies: @wrestlingprincess80 @whatdoeseverybodywant @blacst4r @paigereeder @alyyaanna @raya-hunter01 @mzv11 @trippinsorrows @partypoison00

(If you would like to be added to my official taglist please comment and I will add you, and if you want to be removed, please let me know🤍)

[princecharmingwinks]

Sterek Fic Rec - 2024

Guess who's backkkkk??? Ok so I know that I am late but only by like 4 days? So not too bad. Anyway! Welcome to Prince's 2024 Fic Rec List! I am now aiming to do a list every year (and more if we are lucky but let's not promise that hehe). As always here are my top 10 fics I read and a special bonus mention !

Perfect Star That Hid by thebigoblin (1/1 | 1K | Teen)

He turns his hand— It’s not bare, anymore. His wrist — it has a name. His soulmate’s name. He stares. And stares and stares because what the hell. This has to be a joke, right?

Last Christmas (I gave you my heart) by jadore_hale (1/1 | 4K | Teen)

“W-what is this?” Derek couldn’t even begin to get his mind around this current situation. “My Christmas gift to you, nephew.” Peter pushed the guy towards him, and Derek hastened to catch him before he fell face first on the floor. “I’d like you to meet your soul mate.” *** Derek's uncle Peter decides to get a little more creative this Christmas by finding Derek's soulmate and stuffing him in a box with a pretty bow on top.

Stiles Stilinski, Magical PI by suzvoy (1/1 | 21K | Mature)

Stiles is a Private Investigator, only not really. He's also magical, but only close up. One thing he's really good at is lusting over people from afar, which is why it's a problem when Laura Hale hires him to help her brother.

Wanted and Wounded by RoxyRosee (3/3 | 12K | Explicit)

Derek can't seem to get off. It's been days with no luck, and he's constantly on edge. But then pack night rolls around, and when Stiles falls into him as he goes to sit down on the couch, Derek is suddenly coming, right where he sits. Turns out, Stiles is his mate. And among a whole slew of embarrassing side effects to this whole "mate" thing is the fact that Derek will never again be able to have an orgasm without Stiles by his side. So yeah, Derek's life kind of sucks right now.

Welcome to the Jingle by Jmeelee (1/1 | 1K | Mature)

Derek could admit—only to himself, of course, never out loud—that he was a little desperate to make new holiday traditions with his (officially all adults now thank god) pack. But his ideas had run more along the lines of a cozy take-out dinner at his new apartment, an ugly sweater or white elephant party, or maybe volunteering at the local soup kitchen. It had not involved spending Christmas Eve at Jungle.

Hey Dad, Derek Hale Is In My Room. Bring Your Gun. by fairytalesandfolklore (1/1 | 767 | Teen)

Being the Sheriff's kid is hard enough. Having a seemingly over-protective father who's more concerned about your bad influence than your ex-murder-suspect werewolf boyfriend is so much worse.

"The point is, I'm an adult," he amends, heaving a weary sigh as he attempts to salvage whatever is left of his dignity. "I can make my own decisions, and I choose Derek. He makes me happy. He's a good guy. He treats me well. He looks out for me, keeps me safe. He's responsible and respectful and a complete gentleman, and I really think that if you just got to know him a little better, you'd really—" The Sheriff holds up a hand, effectively cutting Stiles off mid-ramble. "I like Derek just fine," he says, and the smile that spreads across his face is warm and genuine. "You do?" Stiles falters, completely thrown. "Wait, so then why—" The Sheriff's fond smile turns to one of wry amusement. "It's you I don't trust, Stiles," he says around a hearty chuckle. "I've raised you for 18 years, I know exactly what kind of mischief you're capable of. Wouldn't want you dragging that nice, respectable boy into any trouble."

The Hoodie by PersePhonesDreams (1/1 | 1K | General)

Stiles didn’t mean to keep Derek’s hoodie—really, he didn’t. But the oversized, ridiculously soft thing quickly became his favorite comfort item, a piece of Derek he couldn’t quite let go of. It’s not like Derek would notice anyway... right? When Derek unexpectedly shows up at Stiles’ window one quiet night, Stiles’ not-so-secret attachment to the hoodie is exposed, leading to a conversation that changes everything. Cue awkward confessions, teasing smiles, and the realization that maybe Derek doesn’t mind Stiles keeping more than just his hoodie.

Over the Hedge(witch) by rororowyourboat (1/1 | 7K | Teen)

Derek moves into a new house with Laura and he is flustered by the hot gardener next door who is always just slightly dirty.

And When I Wake You're There I'm Saved by suchfun (1/1 | 14K | Teen)

"Derek," Stiles says, firm. His hand is warm on Derek's shoulder. "I'll be okay." "You didn't leave me," Derek argues. "How can you expect me to leave you?" Stiles rolls his eyes. "Oh my god, it'll be fine. Even if I am captured, I'm just a boring human. They wanted you for your Lycan blood." Derek crosses his arms. Mainly so he doesn't wrap his hands around Stiles' throat in an attempt to throttle some sense into him. "That's fine. But this isn't a time when being a boring human is an asset. This is a time when being a boring human results in a shot to the head." "Derek," Stiles says again. He steps closer, so Derek is surrounded in his scent, his chemosignals—namely unwavering, resolute determination, distinctively sharp and entirely unbreakable—clouding Derek's mind. "You'll come back for me." He sounds so sure, and he can tell the exact moment Derek gives in. Because Derek somehow always gives in to Stiles. "I'll come back for you," he confirms. "And you better not be dead." Stiles grins, eyes sparkling with far too much humour for someone who potentially just sacrificed himself for a surly Lycan and bunch of strangers. "You do say the sweetest things."

Remember What's Lost by AMatchInWater (1/1 | 7K | Explicit)

Wild Hunt AU, Stiles gets taken and Derek instantly knows something is wrong with his memory, but just doesn't know what until Lydia calls him, begging for his help to get Stiles back because she thinks they have the strongest connection. When Derek saves Stiles he stops at nothing to finally get what's his.

princecharmingwinks special mention (this fic has a heck of a lot of emotions and when Derek fell to his knees, my heart broke. you gotta read it to find out why! don't worry I will never read or rec unhappy endings)

Horizons into Battlegrounds by AClosedFicIsNeverRead (1/1 | 15K | Explicit)

Derek has always kept his distance from Stiles, refusing to act on his instinctive desire for the pale, doe-eyed human. But at what cost? When circumstances reveal the horrors that Stiles has suffered due to Derek's self-imposed distance, will the Alpha be able to make it right before it's too late? ______________________________________________________ “Who are you to the pack?” the hunter asked. “I’m nobody.” Stiles answered plainly. And a harsh chill ran through Derek’s body. His breath caught in his throat because… because Stiles’ heart… it had remained steady. Stiles… actually believed that. Believed that he was ‘nobody.’ How could Stiles believe that?

That is all for 2024 my friends! Please remember to give kudos and leave comments for all our amazing Sterek writers. I know I'd be lost without you all. Thank you!

[matthewswifeyy]

After awhile you went quiet, and I got mean 4

Summary: Exgirlfriend!reader lives with S4!rafe. She constantly has to watch rafe treat someone better and it finally gets to her

Part 1 part 2 Part 3 part 5

Rafes pov

I was enjoying my drink when I heard footsteps behind me and a voice calling my name. I put glass down and look behind me. I see topper walking up behind me. I roll my eyes and turn back to my drink.

Of course she went to him.

“Yo what the fuck is up with you huh” he said patting my shoulder.

“Nothing” I said shrugging his hand off me.

“Nothing huh. So you’re just kicking Y/n out for no reason.” He said sitting down next to me.

“There was a reason alright” I told him leaning back in my chair.

“I know you two have been arguing rafe but come on. You know she has no where and no one to go to.”

“That’s a lie.” I scoffed.

“Rafe are you kidding me.”

“What topper.” I said turning my head my towards him.

“This is Y/n we are talking about here. Not some random.”

“I know topper.” I said before calling the bartender over. “Get me another one”

“And you don’t care about how she’s doing after that at all.”

“She out of my hands” I said as the bartender placed another full glass of whiskey in front of me.

“I give up at this point. Will you at least try and talk to her about it. Whether you wanna make things right or not.”

“Will it get you to leave me alone about it.” I looked at him.

“Yes”

“Then fine i will talk to her. Tell her to meet me at my place tomorrow at 3.” I said before downing my drink and walking towards my car.

I really did want to talk to her. I just had to seem like I didn’t care to topper because of his big mouth.

I miss what I had with Y/n. I really do. Now I feel like I’m a complete idiot for kicking her out because of Sofia just for me to break up with her not even 10 minutes after she left.

I started my car and drove home.

Readers pov

I was sitting in the guest bed reading my book until there was a knock on the door.

“Come in” I said placing my book on the night stand next to the bed while topper busted into the room.

“He said he will talk to you tomorrow at his place at 3” he said quickly.

“Topper are you serious. I said I wanted to know what was going on with him. I don’t want to make things right with him!” I said to him.

“Oh” he said quietly before leaving.

I groaned and threw my head back into the pillows.

———

I was now getting ready to go on a date with a guy I met at the island club. His name was Jackson. I’ve seen him around before but I’ve never talked to him.

I’m extremely excited to say the least. All these years it been rafe. I’m glad it someone new.

I finished my hair, outfit, and makeup and it was now time for jewelry. I picked out a beautiful pair of small gold hoops. I now looked at my necklace options. I stared at the gold necklace with a small heart pendant that rafe got me many years ago.

I sighed as I picked it up. I bit my lip as I continued to stare at it contemplating putting it on.

Fuck it

I undid the clasp and brought it around my neck. I clasped it and brought my hands down to my side. I looked at myself in the mirror as I continued to chew at my lip.

I turned away from the mirror and grabbed my purse from off the bed. I walked out of the guest room and into the living room.

“Where are you going” topper said from the kitchen.

“A date.”

“With who?” He questioned.

“Jackson Moore.” I said proudly.

“You’re joking right. That douche.” Topper said as he tilted his head at me.

“What he seems nice.” I said as a knocked came from the front door.

I walked towards the door to open it to Jackson.

“Hey”

“Hi” I said with a smile.

“You uh ready to go.”

“Yeah” I say nodding my head.

I walked out the door and closed it behind me. I follow behind Jackson to his car. He opened the door for me and gestured me to get in.

I smiled at him before getting in. He closed the door and walked in front of the car and got in the car.

After about a 5 minute drive we had arrived to the island club. Jackson got out of the car while I gathered my stuff. I waited for the door to open but it never did. I looked out the window and saw Jackson waiting for me.

What the fuck is wrong with this guy

I opened the door and got out. Closing the door before walking over to Jackson.

“Sorry couldn’t find my purse.” I lied to save myself from the embarrassment.

“It’s okay” he said before wrapping his arm around my waist as he lead us toward the entrance.

“Table for Moore.” Jackson told the host.

“Okay right this way.” The host lead us to a table in the back corner of the island club. Jackson pulls my chair out and sits in his seat.

“Thank you” I said quietly.

Our date was going great. We ordered our food and talked. We currently were sitting in a comfortable silence waiting for the bill.

“I have a question Y/n” Jackson said breaking the silence.

“What’s up”

“I know that you and rafe aren’t on the best terms but I was wondering if you would want to go with me to his party tomorrow night.” He asked me.

“Um sure. You won’t have to pick me up though. All of my stuff is at his place still so I’ll probably get ready there if that’s okay with you.”

“Oh that’s okay.” He said as the host dropped the bill of at the table.

As he signed the bill as I grabbed my purse. I took one last sip of my wine before standing up. Jackson came up behind and put his hand on the small of my back.

“Shall we go, my lady.” Jackson joked.

That was something rafe would always say whenever we finished our dates.

“Yeah” I said with a fake laugh.

We walked to the car and saw rafe sitting at the bar. He turned around and locked eyes with mine. I quickly looked away.

Rafes pov

Jackson Moore.

He’s been on my shit list since 8th grade. He always has been going after everything I do.

I’m not surprised he’s with her. He probably only likes her because I dated her.

I was finishing my drink when I heard my phone ping.

Y/n:I’m coming to your place at 8 instead of 3.

Rafe:why

Y/n:I’m going to your party with Jackson. I have to get ready there because all of my stuff is there. We can talk then.

Rafe: k

I sighed and shoved my phone in my pocket before leaving the island club.

————————————————————————

Taglist: @tincanhat @maybankslover @esposamultifandom

[dckweed]

ROSIE!, alpha!simon riley x omega reader

in which captain price sends alpha simon on a much needed vacation to his secluded countryside cabin, but leaves out a most important detail- he has a live in omega caretaker to care for his little cabin when he’s away! and she’s the prettiest, sweetest little thing that simon ever did see..

warnings: alpha/omega universe, mentions/depictions of abuse, smut, pregnancy, kind of forced proximity?, ill add as i go...please note that i know NOTHING about COD but i am in love with the 141 guys and this has been rotting in my brain. abuse is depicted in this one right off the bat,ptsd/nightmares, panty sniffing, face sitting, over stim, biting, squirting, i think our wolf just hates us okay? because everytime i write her, she comes out so mean.

please click this link! each click helps me earn some extra money, as well as each person that clicks the link and signs up (its completely free, and takes 0 time), a completely harmless way to earn some extra cash that doesn't involve giving me any of your own!

happy new years :) feel free to send thots/ideas to my inbox for these babes (or even for the other 141 fellas)

series masterlist here.

PART THREE: hurts si’

“You dumb bitch, look what you did!” Glass clattered and a hand made contact with your face, causing something to drop from your hands as they flew to your face for protection, a whimper leaving your puckered lips as sharp shards scatter about the ground and imbed in the skin of your legs, stinging. “Are you fuckin’ dropping shit now? Huh?” Another blow, this one landing on your ear, causing it to ring and your eyes to blur for a moment as you wobbled on the balls of your feet, swaying from side to side. The man yelling at you was larger than you, older. His breath was hot and sour as he screamed in your face, his words sounding a million miles away as you tried to focus. What had you done this time? It wasn’t you that had knocked over the glass of water..you weren’t even near that side of the table..it was all your brother, all the boy who sat and watched as your father threatened to beat you black and blue again for something that you didn’t do. 

The ringing becomes too much, you fall to your knees and groan, head pounding and eyesight blurry, you barely notice the shards of whatever dish had fallen from your hands pushing further into the skin of your shins as you sink to the rough wood floor of the kitchen. 

“...OFF THE FUCKING FLOOR, OMEGA!” He screamed, your hearing seeming to come back around, or maybe he just bellowed loud enough to overpower the ringing..you shook violently, fear and pain ringing through your body as he grabbed you by the hair on your scalp, dragging you across the ground, pushing the sharp bits of glass deeper into your skin..you would have to go digging to get them out now..

“No!NO! Papa, Papa please!” Your voice was frantic, shrill eyes wide as they finally focused enough to comprehend where he was pulling you off to, the familiar dingey wooden door of your own personal hell hole coming into sight. You’d only just been allowed out after..you couldn’t even remember how long..long enough that the days blurred together and you couldn’t tell how many tomorrows had come and passed. “No! I’ll be good, i’ll be good!” You clawed at his arm above you, trying desperately to pry his alpha strength off of your head, kicking your legs in an effort to slow him down, to buy yourself enough time to talk him out of it. 

“There’s no such thing as a good Omega, you’re living proof!” He growls, throwing open the deadbolt to the door before swinging it open. The darkness awaiting you seemed thicker than usual. “You all deserve to be punished! To be hid, to be locked away and never looked at again! You deserve to be treated like the runts and vermin you fucking are! Your mother tricked me into thinking that she was sweet and innocent, that she needed me to protect her, to fill her with little alpha pups, and then she gave me you! And then you killed her when you breathed life and stole hers, and i saw you for what you are, nothing but a conniving, evil monster!” He held your hair tightly at the top of the stairs, forcing you to look up into his eyes as he ranted at you, for something that you didn’t even remember. Weren’t capable of remembering..

He raised you off of your feet and your eyes widened, a shrill plea leaving your chest “NO, NO! N-AHHGH!”

Simon lay in bed, hands balled into fists behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling, the moon dancing across it as it shined through his window, jaw clenched as he listened to you whimper and moan through the thin wall separating your room from his. His senses were on high alert, his wolf haywire in his mind. It took every ounce of self control he had not to jerk off to the smell of you, once he started he knows he probably wouldn’t ever stop, not until he’d had the real thing and not just the thought of you. He knew that his cock was probably going to be perpetually hard now, never going to go down until he’d stuffed the meaty length of it into your sweet smelling cunt, not until he’d fucked it good and stuffed it full of his pups would he even be able to think like a normal alpha again. 

The smell of you was intoxicating. It flooded his senses and over powered his mind. You were sweet smelling, decadent he could even say. He had noted it before you’d been in heat but now that you were, even in just the beginning stages, it was more powerful, more endearing and mouth watering. It was enough to make a man forget how to behave. It was enough to drive an Alpha into delirium, to trigger his own rut. 

He grit his teeth, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to think about anything other than you, shoving a knife into someone's chest, pizza and a cheap pint, johnny- no! Not that scottish prick! His wolf howled and he grunted, fisting his own hair just to feel something to keep himself grounded. Johnny wouldn’t shut his trap, his intrusive thoughts and his lack of a thought process allowing him to just blurt out how good you smelled, he could just hear his voice in his head, could hear him “Bet that lit’le cunt is nie’ n warm, wet ‘n sloppy, eh LT? Smells like a fookin’ dream..” He was just shooting up in bed with a growl at imaginary Johnny when your scream pierced his ears, his bedroom door slammed against the wall, ricocheting as he busted through yours after flying down the hallway, practically ripping it off of its hinges. He looked around wildly, looking for any sign of an intruder, ready to fight off some stray Alpha or Beta that might have followed your pheromones from town in hopes of mating and breeding you against your will in the middle of the night. 

He saw nobody, saw nothing but you thrashing wildly in the middle of the king sized bed you had built your nest upon, spotting the hoodie he’d shrugged off of his body and laid in the middle of your spot while you took a hot bath earlier in the day, satisfied that he could leave you alone with something to scent to help calm you down. He had paid enough attention in Omega anatomy class to remember that that was something that you guys craved, and just the scent of a strong Alpha could help ease the pain wrought by your heat. You were in pain, he decided, that was why you had screamed as you had, there was nothing for him to protect you from, nothing for him to keep you safe from in your vulnerable state. 

He had just wrestled his wolf back from the forefront of his mind and was slowly backing away from your bed and back towards the hallway when you let loose another scream, this one was one of pure terror. You were sat straight up in bed, his fight or flight triggered, he throws himself at you, wrapping his arms around you as he throws you back down, tucking you into his body as he looses a mean growl, baring his teeth as he looked all about, trying to find what you were so terrified of. 

“No!NO!” You screamed, thrashing and bucking under him, your eyes squeezed shut. He looks down at you, wolf going crazy. “Help her! HELP HER YOU BIG DUMB OAF CAN’T YOU SEE SHE’S SCARED?!” His wolf whimpered, howled, only making Simon’s heart race more as he tried to form a coherent thought. 

“Rosie..” He grunted, patting your face lightly,  still clutching you to his body as best as he could, legs on either side of you as he hovered over you on the bed. “Rosie, lovie, wake up-wake up, lovie..” He patted your face, again, a little harder this time and your eyes finally fluttered, looking up at him. 

“S’mon?” You whispered, hands clutching the chest of his tank top from where your arms were trapped between the both of your bodies, unable to move with his weight pressed against yours. “Had a bad dream..”

He sighs, head leaning down so his forehead is touching yours, noses brushing against each other. “I know, lovie, i know.” He says after a moment, shifting his body so that you’re laying on top of him, using his chest and shoulders as a pillow, legs entwined with his own. All thoughts of breeding you gone and out the window for now, his only thought and instinct to keep you safe. “Not goin’ anywhere okay? Gonna stay right 

‘ere an’ keep you safe..” 

And he did, letting you doze back off on top of him, his mind still reeling as he tried to imagine exactly what had happened in that head of yours to make you scream with such terror, to have you so scared that he could feel your body shaking. He wanted, no he needed to know so that he could make sure you were never scared of it again. So he could take it and obliterate it for ever making you feel anything but safe under the same roof as him. 

Eventually, his wolf and his mind calmed down and he was able to lull himself into a light sleep of his own, his arms not moving from around you. 

You wake to a warmth spread from your head to your toes, a dampness to your skin that had you wriggling out of your sleep shirt with eyes closed still, not registering the soft body beneath you until you went to plop your head back down and it didn’t sink into the soft down of your pillow, but the scraggly hairs of a muscular, wide chest that was poking out of the top of a gray tank top, the kind a man would wear under his tshirt if he wanted the extra layers, or sleep in, you supposed. You knew immediately that it was Simon and as if on cue your wolf fought her way to to the front of your mind, your aching cunt clenching around nothing but your sopping panties as you realized that your mound wasn’t too far from where his cock would be, your leg thrown over his waist, held there by one of his large, meaty hands gripping your equally meaty thigh. 

“Look at him, our pretty Alpha..so handsome, so strong..” She wasn’t wrong, he was pretty. His skull mask was nowhere to be found, and to say it was strange to not see it adorned on his face would be an understatement, but it wasn’t unwelcomed. “Want to give him pretty little pups, let him fill us, please, please, please! I’ll be so good! I promise!” You groan, trying to shut her voice out, though it was hard to do. At this stage, your mind belonged to her, this was her time, and you had always let it be, but you hadn’t had an Alpha home during your heat in..awhile. 

You let your eyes roam over his face for a while, failing to notice the way his breathing changes as he fully wakes up, aware of your gaze. He has such a strong jaw, a strong, handsome face, sweet looking even, you would say, despite the scars lingering along his pale skin. Your lips quiver at the realization that someone had probably put them there and that thought alone made you want to cry because how could anyone ever want to hurt this perfect specimen of an alpha? His nose is terribly crooked, as if it had been broken on more than one occasion..you would know, yours had been broken at least three times that you remembered. You wanted to sit on it. To feel his nose brush against your aching, throbbing clit, to feel his scruff of a beard that had grown over night against the apex of your thighs, leaving beard burn as he fucks you with his wet, strong tongue. 

You don’t notice that your hips are bucking against the side of his hard stomach, don’t realize you’ve whimpered until his hand squeezes your thigh, fingers marking the skin from the way that he grips at it, brown eyes suddenly shot open and staring you down, full lips tugged into a wicked smirk. 

“Easy there, babygirl..” He grunts, voice thick and raspy after not having used it for a bit. 

You pout at his words,  wolf whimpering. The desperate noise leaves your throat and you feel no shame as your hips buck again, needing the friction. 

“Hurts Si’..” You whimper, not giving a damn to ask why he was in your bed in the first place. You remembered having a nightmare, remembered him vaguely waking you from it. You assume he had stayed to make sure you were okay. “Need you..need you to help me, Simon..please?” 

He closes his own eyes at your words, fingers digging further into the fat of your thigh, as if he’s trying to control himself. You don’t want him to, you want hm to lose control, to use you in any way he saw fit, you wouldn’t fight him, would be as pliable for him as you could possibly be, you just wanted to breathe in his scent, suck his cock into your aching pussy for a bit..like a chew toy for the wolf taking over your mind. 

You can’t help but to giggle for a second at the thought, you couldn’t help but to think that his cock was probably big enough to pose as a chew toy anyway, no way you could get your mouth all the way around it if he let suck it. 

“Rosi-”

“Simonnn” You preen, pouting at him and you can just feel the resolve break. Oh! What a good Alpha, not making us beg! “Please help me..hurts..need you so bad..please!”

A growl bubbles in his chest and you could how in excitement knowing you’ve won, “Fine!” Knowing he’s about to bully his cock into your cunt until he’s had his fill, until you’re crying and begging him for more, until he’s knocked you up good with one of his little blonde pups- “But i’m not going to fuck you,” A whine as you pout and you watch his eyes widen, watch him fight with himself for a second as he shakes his head, as if shutting up that voice that you  know he hears too. “No-don’t do that babygirl..You listen to me now.” The sternness in his voice catches your attention, your cunt pulsing at the way it radiates through you. “I want to fuck you so bad, lovie, want to sit you on my cock for fuckin’ hours, believe me, it’s all ‘ve been able to think about since I walked into that garden..but I can’t do it when you’re not all the way there, when you’re delirious in heat..” A pout that damn near breaks him, that definitely breaks the wolf in his head, howling ricocheting in his ears as he tries to talk. “I’m going to fuck you, lovie, but not until your heat is done, yeah? Don’t worry babygirl, m’still gonna help you though, know it hurts, baby, know you need my help..” 

You hadn’t realized he had bunched the waistband of your panties in his hand until then, letting go of your thigh to pull at the seam of the fabric, ripping it apart and tugging it from your mound. You watch with wide eyes as he brings the soaked cotton to his crooked nose, closing his eyes as he takes a long sniff, a deep growl radiating through the room as he opens his eyes, staring straight into yours as his fist clenches around your panties. 

“Cm’ere, babygirl.” He grunts, pulling at you so that you’re sitting directly on his chest, pussy leaving a wet swatch in his chest hairs as he squeezes both hips. “Wanna sit on my face, don’t you? Saw the way you were looking at me, know just what you were thinkin’ huh?” You nod your head, but make no move to actually do it. You’re so big? What if you suffocate him? Bitch shut the fuck up and let him eat your fucking pussy, you whiney brat! He’s a big boy, he can fucking take it! You had the random thought that your wolf might actually try and kill you if you didn’t let her enjoy this, if you didn’t swallow your self conscious thoughts and let this glorious man eat you for breakfast. “Aht-aht, stop thinking whatever it is you’re thinking-” He pulls your hips so you’re sitting just below his neck now, your hands immediately catching yourself on the headboard, preventing him from pulling you up past his chin. He narrows his eyes at you, you see him shake his head, the firm line his plus lips are set in. A warning to behave and let him be in control. “Don’t-you want this, don’t you..want me to help you? Need me to make it better?” 

“Pleas-ungh” In a show of pure strength, he has you fully sat on his face before you can finish the word, warm, thick tongue devouring you as swirls it around your clit, you can’t help the rock of your hips or the way your head throws back as you moan when his tongue teases your aching whole, nose rubbing against your clit the way you imagined it when you tilted your hips. 

He groans beneath you, hands splayed on your bare ass cheeks, holding you in place as he grips so hard you’re sure his fingerprints will be permanently indented into your skin, not that you think you’d really mind it. “That’s it lovie, ride my face..”

You didn’t have to be told twice now that you had started. The way his tongue worked you open, the way he held you in place but still let you rut your hips against his face, making a slimy, glistening mess..his stubble brushed against your inner thighs, keeping you grounded from coming on the spot, though it doesn’t last for long. He’s got you coming within moments, skilled tongue going between clit and your pulsing hole, giving you what you needed as you rocked back and forth, taking what you wanted. “Tha’s a good girl, lovie..give me one more?” 

You’re not sure how many ‘one more’s’ you give him, but by the time he’s got you on the brink of over stimulation, he’s got his whole tongue buried in your hole, his teeth nibbling at your clit as you buck and tremble, tears brimming your eyes as you grip his hair in each hand, tugging harshly. His hands pushed up your shirt, exposing your soft, pudgy belly to him as he squeezed your tits in each of his large palms, fingers playing with your nipples as he fucks you with his mouth, cries and whimpers leaving your own. 

“Si-oh-mm, please! I can-so good, feel’s so good!” You’re a babbling mess, cheeks red as your thighs shake, still clenched around his head. He’s been at it for almost an hour and you swear he’s barely come up from air, he’s barely let you move off of his face for more than a moment, his mouth leaving your cunt only to praise you or bite into meat of your thighs, leaving a harsh imprint of his mouth, a reminder that this is in fact real. You’re on the brink of another when you realize that this one feels different, feels almost painful, even. “Si-mo-n, si-ugh-umf..hur-urts…” You screech out, swatting at the top of his head, he only grunts, pulling you down farther onto his mouth, his hands going back to grip your tighs, leaving your precious tits unattended as he does, holding you there as he brings another harsh bite to your clit, sending you over the edge. “Simon!” You shout, vision going blurry as something snaps in your lower belly, a gush of fluid coming from your cunt that has your cheeks heating as Simon groans out below you, lapping it up as quickly as it comes out, slurping even as he continues to make out with your pussy as you slouch against the headboard, being sure to avoid your overly sensitive clit as he does, leaving open mouthed kisses to your mound that honestly could have had you coming again if you weren’t entirely fucked out just from his mouth. How many was that? Five? Six? 

“You okay up there babygirl?” His voice is thick and raspy, sexy as he peeks up at you from between your still shaking legs. All you can do is nod meekly, unsure of what to say, mind oddly quiet as you pant out breaths, trying to come down from such an epic high. “Squirted al’over me lovie, legs are still shakin’” He’s chuckling at you, big warm hands rubbing your thighs in an effort to soothe the shaking. 

“M’sleepy, si’” You whimper out, still sagged against the headboard, mind gone numb, legs gone soft, heat and wolf satiated for the time being. 

“Yeah?” He asks, voice soft as he sits up slowly, sliding you down his body. Your clit catches on his chest hairs and the fabric of his now soaked tank top on the way down and your hips jumps, your whimper ringing out as he shushes you, rubbing soothing circles on your lower back. “Need’ta nap baby?” 

Your eyes are already closing before you can get the words out, before you can even nod your head, you barely register the way his lips kiss the side of your head as he leans back with you in his arms, the way his scent floods your senses, easing you into an easy slumber, as if that had been his plan all along. The last thing you remember before sleep takes you completely is wondering what the hell you had gotten yourself into with him..

taglist: @wise-owl @bingoz @astrxsee @gazsluckyhat @howlerwolfmax @thisbitch-6 @littlelovebug98 @ungodlydilf @madsothree

[alisonsfics]

knight in shining armor

pairing: carmy berzatto x reader

summary: you knew carmy would do anything for you in theory. when your abusive ex-boyfriend shows up at the bear, you learn carmy has zero hesitations when it comes to protecting you.

word count: 2k

warnings: mentions of abusive ex, violence (very minor and not graphic)

“God, I cannot wait to finally go home.” You groaned to Sydney as you cleaned down your station for the night. It had been an especially rough night at the Bear. “Tell me about it,” she responded, laughing to herself.

Carmy walked by the two of you, catching your attention. “I mean, nevermind, I love it here so much. Please, don’t fire me.” You teased sarcastically, glancing over at Carmy.

His lips curved upwards. He tried to hide the way that your sense of humor always brought a smile to his face. But he wasn’t as discreet as he thought he was.

“Don’t worry. This place couldn’t run without you.” Carmy joked. Sydney glanced between the both of you, noticing the pink tint on Carmy’s cheeks. She had to fight the urge to tell you both to get a room.

“Hey guys, Fak left early. Can one of you guys run this check out to table 13?” Richie called out. You quickly nodded and set down your towel. “Sure, Richie. I can do it.” You volunteered, taking it out of Richie’s hand.

You walked out to the one table with guests left: three men sitting in a corner booth. You heard them all deeply chuckling, fully focused on their conversation.

“Thank you for dining with us tonight. I just wanted to drop this off—” you started to say but froze when your eyes landed on one of the men.

It was your ex-boyfriend Anthony, well not just your ex-boyfriend, your abusive ex-boyfriend.

You felt a shiver run down your spine. His cold dark eyes stared back at you, leaving you with a sense of powerlessness.

The check fell out of your hands and clattered onto the table, hitting the silverware. Your only instinct was to run to safety.

Carmy was your safety. He was the only one you’d ever told about Anthony. He was the only thought in your head. You spun on your heel and headed back towards the kitchen.

You felt like the room was spinning around you. Your hands started shaking. You felt unsteady on your feet, like the ground could be ripped out from under you at any moment.

You stumbled into the kitchen, your anxiety clouding the noise in the room. You saw Carmy and Sydney having a conversation and laughing, but you couldn’t hear any of the words, only mumbles.

You ran to Carmy’s side. He turned to face you with a smile, about to explain whatever he and Sydney were talking about, but he noticed the panic in your eyes.

You breathlessly mumbled the word “Anthony,” hoping it was enough to jog his memory. Carmy furrowed his eyebrows at you, wondering if he’d misheard you.

It’d been years since you told Carmy about Anthony, so the name was far back in his memory.

The kitchen doors slammed open, smacking against the walls. Pots clattered onto the floor, falling off a shelf near the door. You jumped backwards, your heart starting to race.

Anthony stomped into the kitchen, and you could see the recognition in Carmy’s eyes.

Carmy grabbed your wrist and tugged you behind him. You cowered behind Carmy, not able to look at Anthony.

“Get the fuck out of here. I want you out of my fucking restaurant, you piece of shit.” Carmy yelled, snapping his fingers and pointing towards the door.

Sydney walked up next to Carmy, confused by all the chaos. “Yo, what the fuck is going on?” Sydney asked, looking at Carmy for an answer. Sydney’s gaze bounced between the rugged man standing in the doorway and Carmy’s death grip on your hand.

The pit in your stomach felt like it was going to swallow you whole. You kept your eyes focused on the floor, trying to convince yourself it was just a nightmare.

“Get this fuckhead out of here. Nobody lets him in ever again, you hear me? Where the fuck is Richie? Richie?!?” Carmy yelled, as the majority of the staff came walking into the kitchen from the locker room.

The silence of the room rang in your ears. Marcus jogged up next to you and Carmy. He’d immediately recognized the panic in your face and rushed to help.

Anthony lurched forward, attempting to grab your hand away from Carmy.

Carmy used his free hand to slap him away. “You don’t get to fucking touch her. You will leave her the fuck alone.” Carmy screamed. His face was bright red, his jaw clenched. Carmy was a fiercely loyal guy, but it was to an even higher degree when it was you.

It was only then that Anthony spoke. His words ran through your chest, making all your muscles feel tight. “You really have this little fucker whipped for you. Little manipulative bitch at it again.” Anthony yelled. His words seemed to hang in the air.

You got up the courage to look over Carmy’s shoulder, and you saw Anthony staring back at you.

Then, he turned his attention to Carmy. “Hey, short stuff, unless you’re her little boyfriend, I suggest you stay out of this conversation. It’s frankly none of your business.” He spoke, and Carmy’s grip on your wrist tightened.

“Come on, sweetheart. Let’s go talk.” Anthony said, holding his hand out to you.

Carmy moved his hand to the small of your back and nudged you to stand behind Sydney. She wrapped her arm around your back, holding you close to her as Carmy stepped towards Anthony.

“Listen up, you bastard. She’s not going anywhere with you, and if I ever see you within a block of my restaurant again, I’ll kick your ass.” Carmy threatened.

You realized what he was doing. He was doing everything in his power to keep Anthony’s attention off of you.

It didn’t work. Anthony ignored Carmy and continued staring at you. “You got yourself a little boy toy here? He acts like your fucking protector and savior, and in return, what? You let him fuck you every now and then? Trust me, dickhead, the sex isn’t that good. You can find better. Nobody needs a little slut like her.” Anthony scoffed down at Carmy.

Anthony smirked, when he saw Carmy clench his jaw.

Before you could even process what Anthony said, Carmy punched him in the face, and Anthony fell back against the wall.

Richie finally emerged from the back door after Tina had gone to get him. “I wouldn’t recommend that.” Richie said, pulling the gun out of his waistband before Anthony could jump towards Carmy.

Richie wouldn’t use it, but Anthony didn’t know that.

“Get the fuck out of my restaurant.” Carmy snapped as Anthony ran towards the front door and his friends ran after him.

Carmy spun on his heel and pulled you into his arms. He cradled your body, comfortingly running his hands up and down your back. “It’s okay. It’s okay. He’s gone.” He whispered in your ear.

The room was silent as everyone processed what’d just happened.

“Richie, can you give us a ride back to my place? She can stay on my couch tonight.” Carmy asked softly.

Richie quickly nodded and grabbed his car keys as you both followed him to the car.

Carmy sat in the backseat with you, keeping your hand tightly in his. He was the best friend you’d ever had. He cared about you more than he could explain, which was partially due to his unconfessed feelings.

You didn’t utter a single word on the drive to Carmy’s apartment. Carmy quickly thanked Richie for the ride as he brought you upstairs. He was very aware of the glossy look in your eyes. He recognized and understood the trauma response better than anyone.

He held the front door open for you, keeping his hand protectively on the small of your back. “You want me to start the shower for you?” He asked you softly. You gave him a weak nod and followed him through his bedroom.

You waited silently as he set out a towel and everything you needed. “I’ll order some dinner while you take a shower, okay? Let me know if you need anything.” He said, giving your shoulder a soft squeeze.

You stayed in the shower extra long, letting the hot water run over you. You’d felt grimy since Anthony looked at you, so you hoped you could wash off the feeling.

You finally got out of the shower and dried yourself. You slipped your bra and underwear back on and caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror.

You don’t know what about it set you off. Maybe it was the defeated look in your eyes staring back at you. You felt like you were in the past again. You’d spent so many hours staring in the mirror at bruises Anthony had left on you. All the memories you’d forced into a box were spilling out.

You sunk down to the floor, cradling your legs in your chest. The tears poured out of you, and your whole body shook.

Carmy glanced down at his phone, realizing it’d been a while since he heard the water turn off. He cautiously walked over to the bathroom and softly hit his knuckles against the wooden door. “You doing okay?” He mumbled through the door.

You tried to respond but no words would come out. Your muscles stayed rigid, no matter how much you wanted to stand and open the door.

Carmy opened the door a crack, making sure you were okay.

He saw you curled up on the floor with splotchy cheeks and watery eyes. He felt his heart break. He quickly rushed towards you and picked you up bridal style off the ground.

You normally would have been self-conscious of Carmy seeing you in your underwear, but you were so detached that you almost didn’t notice.

Carmy’s eyes didn’t linger anywhere that wasn’t your eyes. He set you down on the side of his bed, and then quickly grabbed some clothes out of his dresser.

He lifted your hands up in the air and slipped one of his sweatshirts over your head. He grabbed the matching pair of sweatpants and slid your feet through the leg holes.

You wrapped your arms around his neck, as he helped you stand, so he could pull the sweatpants up to your waist and tie the strings.

You stayed completely still, still clinging to him. He wrapped his arms protectively around your waist. “You hungry?” He whispered. You simply shook your head.

“C’mere,” he said, guiding to his bed where he pulled back the covers for you to climb in. He crawled in to sit next to you. He turned on the tv and put on one of your comfort shows.

You leaned over, resting your head on his shoulder. He smiled down at you, running his fingers through your hair.

He didn’t know what to say. There was nothing he could say to fix this.

“Carmy?” You said, your voice coming out weak and fragile.

“Yeah, honey? What’s wrong?” He asked. He’d never called you a pet name before, but it just slipped out. “What if he comes back?” You croaked, your voice cracking.

He pressed a kiss against your temple. “He won’t come back, but if he did, I would keep you safe again. I promise, okay?” He assured you. He waited for you to respond and saw you fighting back tears.

“You risked your life for me. I don’t know how to thank you.” You mumbled, unable to meet his gaze.

He quickly shook his head, dismissing it. “You don’t need to thank me. I'd do anything for you.” He said.

Carmy was in disbelief that he’d actually been able to admit that after all these years. You paused and looked up at him, picking your head up off his shoulder.

You softly placed your hand on his face, cupping his cheek. His eyes glanced down at your lips.

You were worried he’d hear how fast your heart was beating as you leaned in and pressed your lips against his. He kissed you back gently, with a delicateness you’d never seen from him.

He rested his hand on your hip. You felt weightless when his lips were on yours.

You both pulled away slowly. You searched his eyes for any sign of regret. All you saw was the giant smile on his face. “I’ve been waiting a long time to do that.” He said, pressing a kiss to your temple.

taglist: @laurakirsten0502 @miraclesoflove @nathaliabakes @millipop18 @lillyssh-tposts @shyinadarkplace @vanteguccir @missroro @guacam011y @sw33t-cupid @ice-dtae @leyannrae @sia2raw @nyx2021 @just-a-littlebit-of-everything @shyconversationalbookworm @shadowhuntyi @visenyaverse @ruzannetheseahorse @superdeath @wandaswifeyforlifey @spookyqueen @mcuswhore @princess-evans-addict @n3ssm0nique @peakascum @cjand10 @namsey1987 @supernaturalstilinski @stephv213 @warriormirkwood @one-sweet-gubler @narliesstuff @bibissparkles @stupiidfrogs @navs-bhat @marvelcasey05 @velyssaraptor @amanda08319 @mattsfavbigtitties @the-sylver-dragon @0-n-1-x @princesssunderworld @khxna

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[yuurei20]

Prefect Dialogue Options in Twisted Wonderland: Prologue (pt2)

Option 1: In fact, yes. Paintings don't usually talk. Painting: Well, your "usual" and my "usual" clearly differ. Shall we agree to disagree on the matter?

Option 2: Are you with those ghosts from yesterday? Painting: Unlike those restless spirits, always wandering hither and thither, l've been contentedly hanging on this wall for over fifty years.

Option 1: Please, stop him! Deuce: You want me to cast a spell to stop him?

Option 2: He's shirking his cleaning responsibilities! Deuce: What? That's not right! But how to stop him?

Option 1: So now what? Grim: Can't you guys just blow that thing up with magic?

Option 2: Can't you do something with your magic? Deuce: The headmage said it himself— magic has limits. If you can't strongly visualize your magic, it isn't going to happen.

Option 1: Oh, I'd assumed spellcasting just came naturally. Ace: Nope, although if the magic's your specialty, you can use it more intuitively.

Option 2: So that's why Grim can only summon fire. Grim: Hey! I'm gonna learn how to use WAY cooler magic than that, for the record! I'm just hittin' my stride here!

Option 1: Would two of you knock it off already?! Ace & Deuce: *gasp* Grim: Whoa, that was loud. Where'd that come from?

Option 2: So I guess let's all just get expelled, then. Ace & Deuce: What? Grim: Whoa, that was harsh. Where'd that come from?

Option 1: You said it yourself —we can't hurt that thing. Grim: M- myah… Deuce: Urk… But… But what are we going to do, then?!

Option 2: Why not try cooperating a little? Ace: With Loosey-Deucey? No way. He'd get me killed! Deuce: Like it'd be some treat for me to work with you?!

Option 1: What if we all just worked together? Ace: "Work together"… Is that some kinda joke? You always say the lamest things with the straightest face, prefect.

Option 2: What if we came up with a proper plan first? Ace: A proper plan? Like some kinda buddy move? Is that a joke? You always say the lamest things with the straightest face, prefect.

[maskedmenmakemeferal]

New Years Eve party

(I know I’m late,I’m sorry guys🙏)

Simon,for once,is on leave during the holiday season. Since he doesn’t have a family to celebrate the holidays with,he volunteers to stay over the 2 week stretch from December 20 to January 6th. But,the base was getting fumigated,so he has to leave.

He’s been renting a flat and loaning it to one of Soaps copious siblings for about a year or two. The deal is,when he’s on leave,he stays in a spare room and Soaps sibling coughs up half the rent.

He called the sibling on his Uber home from the airport,only to be greeted by the sound of a party. It’s nothing outrageous,a few people together playing board games,but still a party.

“Aye,Simon,ya’ finally on leave?” The familiar Scottish accent fills his ears.

“Yeah. Base is gettin’ fumigated. Is the spare room free?” The Uber driver pulls up infront of the house

“Yeah. Fair warnin’,I have a few friends over for a New Year’s Eve par’y.”

“I’ll live.” His gruff Manchester accent fills the back of the car as he gets out. “Thanks.” He hands the driver a 20 for his trouble and gets out. The driver smiles and wishes him a happy new year.

He hangs up on Soaps sibling and heads up to unlock the door. He opens it,weariness hitting him like a bus. But, he sees something that jolts him awake.

He sees the most beautiful person alive. They’re sitting on a recliner,the one he used to chain smoke cigarettes on every Christmas before Price allowed him to stay in base.

Their head was tilt forward in laughter,arms clutching your stomach at a joke you made. Your friends are all drunk and giggling themselves.

“Aye,the life of da fuckin’ par’ys here!” Soaps sibling smiles,getting up. They go around,introducing everyone of his friends. They land on you afterwards.

You look up at his hulking form,worried when you see him ‘glare’ at you.

In all actuality,he’s looking at you like your one of the seven wonders of the world and he’s a blind man seeing for the first time. Your awkward smile,your sweet sounding voice as you offer to let him have your seat.

“Nah,you’re fine.” He shakes his head. He pulls a chair from the kitchen and sits a bit away from the actual party.

They’re playing some card game,probably Uno with a drinking element. You tilt your shot glass to your full lips and lean your head back. Simons eyes travel down the column of your throat.

You set it down and draw 2,lovingly flipping off the person who put down a draw 2 you had the cards to the pile in your hand,which would have to be half the deck.

Soon,the party decides to watch a movie,so you take it as an invitation to talk to Simon. The usual stuff,like ‘how’d you get invited’ and ‘what is it you like to do’.

All he’s focused on is the women infront of him,who’s face is half illuminated by the shitty horror movie the party decided to choose.

‘Fuck’ he thinks. ‘I should come home for the holidays more often.’

Little did you or him know,Soaps recommendation to Price about being late on standard fumigations and Soaps sibling throwing a party may or may not have been a coincidence.

[chrollocism]

the blue lock brainrot is getting to me

itoshi sae x f!reader (wc: 4.2k) — angst, unrequited love… reader tries to stop her feelings (spoiler : it’s not going well), reader is shorter than sae, blissfully unaware sae, rin is a brother figure to reader, making out (not sae and reader…), suggestive?, jealousy, crying, and what not. NOT PROOFREAD

a/n : do i continue this or do you guys like the burn… masochists. I’M JOKING fr tho

itoshi sae really is cruel. you learned that from the beginning but you couldn’t help yourself. it got to the point not even rin—your bestfriend and younger brother to your crush could snap you out of it.

days where you would go ages without crying about your stupid boy problems were days when sae would some-what acknowledge you in his presence. cloud nine is what you felt like, floating with and above the clouds in the silly imagination in your brain.

it hurt.

hurt to see how popular he really is with the girls in school. to his credit, he barely entertained their advancements. keyword : barely, there was a time when he look like he got swept off his feet with a really smart girl.

she was beautiful, no wonder he loved her. she lived for herself, respected his decisions between her and soccer, and never got too much in his hair. a quick realization that sae was into low-maintenance girls.

but now, he never entertained any other girl. it was pretty obvious they were starting to get serious about it—have you seen the way he looks at her? thanks aika, i haven’t… i have, and i’m jealous is what you really want to say but you never do because you weren’t about to be some home wrecker.

walking through the halls felt different at this point in time, probably due to way you were already only a school year before becoming a senior… maybe also because you’re still crushing on itoshi sae.

5 years deep and it’s like you’re not even remotely close to getting over him. but what’s it to you when you can’t have him anyway? however, it doesn’t stop a feeling bubble up within you when you see him and his lovely girlfriend, hana.

never took a genius to realize sae wasn’t the biggest fan of physical touch but judging the way he holds her hand—ever so slightly squeezing it—in the hallways during break, looks as if at least 3 years of dating cracks his nonchalant shell.

you didn’t even realize you were staring that hard when rin snaps you out of your jealous daze. “you’re so… lukewarm.” he deadpans at the pitiful frown that’s resting on your face, he knows what you’re staring at.

if rin was going to be honest with you, he isn’t the biggest fan of hana for no particular reason (part of him says it’s because of you, but really, he’s jealous too. ever since his big brother got with her, sae became colder). but he wasn’t cruel like his brother, he wasn’t going to hate a girl like that.

not to be mean but why was he friends with you in the first place? you were 2 grades ahead of him, weird, and in love with his brother. he didn’t have an answer to that but it’s been too long for him to let go.

the hate within you was irrational and you were afraid you might snap. you didn’t want to hate the girl, it was clear she was head over heels for him as well, she just confessed first, right?

meh, if you confessed in her place, you would’ve gotten rejected. now you were moping again. “has she ever been to your house?” a sudden snap of your voice and rin was looking at you again, an annoyed expression appeared on his already annoyed face.

“weirdo. she has, though. big bro doesn’t have training today so either he’s gonna go to her house or she’s gonna come to ours.” he answers, you were now on the verge of tears, as if your heart isn’t already broken…

“can i come to your house…?”

it was a quiet question. not that it was that weird because you’ve stayed over after school. albeit, sae was never around, never. today was a rare chance you might see him there (with his girlfriend). “you’re hopeless.” and he’s already off to God knows where.

he didn’t object to it so you might as well try later after classes. by the time you focused your eyes back to where you last saw sae and hana together, they’ve disappeared. another lonely lunch, great.

twenty minutes was more than enough time for you to finish the small meal you packed yourself earlier this morning but when you’re sitting on a bench in one of the most secluded and quietest (and beautiful) places in school, your mind starts to wander again.

sae never actually addressed you by your name before. when you think about it, you’re only ‘rin’s friend’ to him, nothing more. can’t be mad because it is fair. you never had the courage to talk to him either because he’s so dry.

almost like you’re afraid of him.

why?

why you’re afraid? simple, he’s dry, he’s scary, he probably thinks you’re weird, he has a girlfriend and you’d be a bad guy to disrupt anything, you don’t know what he’s thinking because he’s quite literally unreadable, he’d smart, he’s still popular with the girls but he spares them no time, hana probably flames you online, and he’s a-

no.

huh?

why do you like him.

now you were at a loss of thoughts for someone who believes her mind will never shut up. it’s a great question, why do you like him? is it because he was athletic (you love athletic people…), because you have a thing for your friends’ siblings? it was something deeper in you that you couldn’t dig up.

most of your friends knew about your crush because you would not shut up about it but when he got with hana, you actually shut up for once. the hype died down after you stopped talking about it. but of course, there is someone who still knows—rin.

before you could squeeze another thought in, the bell rings. the first bell rings 5 minutes before class actually starts so students can start packing up to go to their respective classrooms.

did you really spend fifteen minutes on a date with your thoughts? yeah. you looked down at the food that was still rested peacefully on your lap, uneaten and cold. it was unavoidable, you were sad.

funny, you thought you’d be sadder because of the thoughts of sae just now but the real reason was because you weren’t able to eat. even so, you weren’t going to be late to class and you took the cover of your bento box off the side of the bench you weren’t sitting on and closed it.

walking back into the school’s building wasn’t particularly joyful but you managed.

when you sat back in your classroom seat, the first thing you did was reach over to your schoolbag that was hung beside your seat to stuff your untouched lunch into and took out your notebook.

the notebook was boring by itself. a plain front and a wooden back. the contents of the book weren’t much interesting either, notes that varied from being extra neat to being an absolute train-wreck. of course, little doodles of madness appeared in some pages.

there was a pen that was snug on your id lace so you took that. it was a cute pen, the top half was clear for the most part with designs of chibi maruko-chan being splattered randomly. that sounds really weird but to be fair, you did love chibi maruko-chan before knowing sae liked her too.

sadly, the totally random remembrance of the muddy red-head being in the same class as you clicked in you. awkwardly shooting up from being nose deep into writing your notes to look at where he was seated. thank whoever made the seating arrangement… if he wasn’t seated in the front with his back turned to you, he’d probably notice your staring almost immediately.

not saying he didn’t notice. as soon as you went back to writing you could see him slightly turn around to look at you, you truly felt like you dodged a bullet.

the remainder of the school day wasn’t eventful, except for the last class, science. normally you don’t mind the subject but when your teacher mentions something about a pair-work, you perk up.

you know your teacher meant no harm when she used counting off to pair people up. forty divided by two would be twenty so the first half of the class would count up to twenty before it restarts back to one. you’re already beaten up by math so you decide to skip doing your calculations on what number you’d be, sae counted sixteen.

after the twentieth count of the first half, your half began. “ten!” “eleven” “twelve” “thirteen…” “fourteen!” you snickered when you realized one of your class friends got paired up with the guy she’s been eyeing. “fifteen” oh it’s your turn, “sixteen.” oh shit what?

no way you were just paired up with itoshi fucking sae the one time you don’t care. the assignment was to write a research paper about the earth (nature, humans, animals, etc.) but by the time the teacher was done explaining it, the last bell of the day rang, signaling the end of school—you almost cry because it’s finally friday.

it was only natural for you to head out of the classroom before sae did because one, you didn’t have much to pack (actually, neither did he), two, you were closer to the exit, simple as that.

who prayed for you? because as soon as you stepped outside of the border between the room and the corridors, a voice calls out to you. “hey.” it was a simple word that almost made you fold because of who said it.

you turned around and saw the man with ridiculously long bottom lashes looking right back at you. standing there in front of him made you feel like a twelve year old girl again but you suppressed the urge to act like it.

“hi.” you respond back, thankful for the time you took to get ready, being able to pat on some blush because you could feel the heat come up to your cheeks. he takes one more step forward and you had to stop yourself from taking a step back. “you’re rin’s friend, right? you can come over to our house but hana is gonna be there too so i doubt we’ll be able to do anything. feel free to come, anyway.” he said, no hidden intent behind it either.

“yeah. i was planning to go anyway.” you show a smile that isn’t reciprocated. you tried to stop yourself from saying anything else but you couldn’t stop. “hana?” you dumbass. “girlfriend.” was all he said back before walking past you.

stunned.

wow, what manners… it’s cool, though… he respects his relationship and doesn’t entertain you either. still, are you really just his brother’s friend to him? what classmate doesn’t know everyone’s name, wouldn’t matter if it was early in the school year but it’s like a few weeks away from summer… you knew he didn’t bother to care much for school but damn okay…

you walk to the front gate, the afternoon sun warm on your cheeks when you walk outside. surprisingly, rin was actually waiting for you, unlike most times. a creepy smirk is shown through your face.

he’s already looking like he’s going to run away from you. “stop that, you look weird.” he rolls his eyes and you giggle because you know that’s how he normally greets you.

the walk was mostly of you blabbering about whatever and him just slipping in comments, you were like a ransom note that could not be deciphered. of course, you told him about the english thing but he didn’t say much about it, only nodded.

he really only knows me because of you.

“be glad he even knows you.”

i don’t get math

“i’m two grades below you and i can assure you, we already learned that.”

does sae talk to you?

“what question is that? he’s my brother, obviously”

does… does he talk about hana to you?

“…”

the response you got was silence. without a verbal answer, you couldn’t know for sure and honestly, you didn’t have a single idea in your mind. “hello?” you asked like you were in a haunted house, waiting for a response from a ghost. “i guess he does. it rarely happens anymore, he was a lot more open when they first made it official. but whenever he does talk about it, feels like he’s still fifteen.” he actually gave you an answer.

a cheeky grin from you and he was staring at you while walking. “what’s that about?” he’s puzzled and points towards your face and very obvious happiness. “he really loves her.” you sappily say, a tug at your heartstrings has you looking away from him to look at the beach nearby.

sae still makes you feel like you’re an immature twelve year old girl again who first became hopelessly in love with him.

hana makes him feel like a fifteen year old teen again where he knew he had eyes for her, and her only.

you’re an idiot.

and it fucking hurts.

‘i guess so.” was all he had to say before the tears you were trying to hard to blink away came spilling out and went down your cheeks. what a sad way to cool you down from the heat. rin isn’t great at reading emotions, he isn’t great at comforting either but you can feel that he tries.

grabbing the tissue from his bag’s hygiene kit, he hands it over to you and you accept it with a stuffy ‘thank you…’

this is new. you cry over boys all the time but never when sae acknowledges you. he talked to you directly, yet why are you crying? the thin paper in your hand soon becomes unusable after soaking up the tears on your face.

the door in front of you was uncomfortably familiar. it was the door you could open and run into open arms whenever you had family problems at home. you’ve become quite familiar with the itoshi family (except sae because that man is something!). rin fiddles with the stupid keychain (you gave it to him) that holds his home keys and unlocks the door.

rin led you to his room, opening the door and you followed behind him, shutting it. the click of a switch opened the room’s lights. you smiled at the scene. you weren’t the only one who cried. you remember there came a time where rin also had problems with his parents, always choosing his brother over him.

he’s always had some resentment towards sae but they were still brothers, nonetheless.

“do you know when sae is coming home?” you ask but he shrugs. “dunno, ask him. you have his number don’t you?” he sighs and he’s off to his desk and on his phone. you opt to plop down on his bed.

in any other situation, the roles would be reversed but apparently rin had something to do. but hey, a win is a win.

you mentally cringe at his solution, remembering the first time you got his number…

you : hey! just wanted to say good luck on your game tomorrow :)

[seen]

you’re so over it now (you aren’t). he wasn’t with hana at the time of the text yet he didn’t respond, not even bothering to react to it either, jeez he really hated you.

twenty minutes pass and you hear the jingle of keys and a twist of the lock from the front.

the voice you really want to hate announces that they’re home and you hear a girl’s giggle follow quietly. it isn’t long until there’s a knock on rin’s bedroom door. “you there?” it was undeniably sae’s voice.

“yeah.”

the doorknob carefully turns and is swung open.

he’s standing just before the line that separates with the door. even if his stature far exceeds yours, you can still see the very clear figure of a girl behind him, flowing light brown hair, she’s pretty.

you can’t see her clearly but you can imagine how she looks like right now. puppy eyes with gleaming love spread across her cornea, looking up at the back of sae’s head with uttermost nostalgia. you don’t want to think about it again but it’s possible sae makes her feel like she’s fifteen all over again too.

sae is just standing there, scanning over the room before he spots you, splayed on his brother’s bed with your head turned the opposite way, looking at your phone mindlessly (you shifted to this position before he saw you.)

there’s an awkward silence in the room and you don’t want to be the one who breaks it. an eye starts to twitch when someone clears their throat, it was hana. “soo awkward… let’s go to your room, sae.” she giggles lightly. it was like she wanted to egg you on, like she was trying to tease you.

a low hum from sae and the door is shut.

“isn’t he supposed to be your english partner?” rin finally asks, spinning his chair towards his bed. “mhm. but he said we probably won’t get any work done today.” you respond. “you’re hopeless.” and you laugh.

it’s not a lie, you are. as much as it would delight you to lie through you teeth, you’d be lying to yourself too. plus, rin knows already. “yeah.” you admit in defeat before lifting your back to sit. “at this rate, you won’t have a chance.” rin doesn’t hide his disappointment when he says it.

“c’mon rin, did i even have one in the first place?” you scoff sarcastically. the stupid shrug of his shoulders shuts you down completely, you’re tired of chasing a goose you can’t catch, why has it taken you this long to get tired?

you know your parents aren’t worried, would they ever be? because you already told them you’d be at the itoshi house, only getting a thumbs up. it’s quiet again but it isn’t tense.

rin is engrossed in whatever he was doing

you were still mindlessly scrolling on your phone.

don’t think about, don’t think about it, don’t think about it, don’t think about what sae is doing with hana. are they kissing each-other right now? cuddling? holding hands? you don’t know and you don’t want to know… okay you do want to know.

and like some kind of mind reader, rin groans. “thinking about stalking? me too.” he’s already getting up from his chair and the corner of your lips start hurting by how wide your smile is, he really is your best friend.

as stealthily as you guys can, you tip toe towards sae’s room.

kind of like old times when rin would accompany on your sneaky peaks (sae knew what you guys were doing).

something is off. the red head is usually—no—always a private who keeps to himself most of the time so why is his bedroom door slightly open? well, enough for both you and your friend to peak into the room. it’s odd, not only to you but to rin as well, both giving each other a raised brow.

there’s no wrong in kissing your beloved. but something wants you to pop a blood vessel, you’re almost clawing at your palm until you realize how weird you’re being, you calm down slightly.

they’re kissing. who are you kidding? they’re full on making out.

if you were sae’s friend, if you didn’t fester feelings for him, if you didn’t want to cry, you’d probably be there singing the ‘kissing in a tree’ song right now.

but you aren’t his friend, you do have feelings for him, and you do want to cry.

lips already in a fine line as you continue to watch. they’re on his bed and it looks like hana is the one taking the lead. it’s quite a scene to watch, sae is holding himself up using his free hand while the other is on her, snaking around her waist.

hana has her hands all over sae’s chest, knees sucked in by the bed underneath her. it’s weird to watch, they’re entangling the mouths together while also trying to catch their breath, looks painful. you’re already covering your face with your hands, all you could ‘say’ was that you weren’t breathing and you were really flustered.

“ew.” rin utters a bit too loud and you can hear the odd sound of lips smacking stop and turn to silence. rin’s hand gripping your wrist and away from your face to run back to his room is all the conformation you need to know that they caught you guys.

you’re all flustered in the room, wanting to scratch your eyeballs out and erase whatever the fuck they were going to do after that out of your head—damn whys your head in the gutter. rin is almost the same, instead looking less flustered and more of a ‘please rip my eyeballs out, holy shit i need holy water.’ type of look.

that was really really super duper dumb of you guys, and you’re older… why’d you let some stupid curiosity get the best of you, you’re a bad influence.

chest heaving and back against the door, you snatch your water bottle away from your bag that was right next to you. big gulps of water drained down your throat, now you’re out of breath.

“God, that was horrifying.” you breathe out and rin silently agrees with you.

something in your chest is tight again. the fuck?

after that, you don’t plan on lingering in the house too long, knowing damn well sae will probably talk to both of you about it if you’re still there and you do NOT want that. it was a rare moment where rin actually whined about you leaving. he’s normally grumpy pants and does not give a shit but he doesn’t want an awkward talk with your brother.

however, you sheepishly tell him that you don’t want to either and that you’d probably break down anyway. he understood, quietly leading you to the door.

the effort was there but sae also. he was standing close to the entrance with his arms crossed and that ever-so nonchalant look on his face. a small squeak escapes you and you mentally kill yourself right there.

“about earlier.” his voice always has some type of sternness to it, it’s still there but you can feel his sympathy. you wanted to kiss him too. you want to blurt it out and you probably will if you don’t book out in the next ten seconds. looking at an invisible message from your parents ‘come back home’ it read.

“looks like my parents are waiting on me!” you nervously say before opening the door and rush out the house. they can’t even react before you’re off running with crazy speed, adrenaline hits you like a truck when you need it.

the brothers both look at the open door in disbelief. sae is already sighing and walking to close the door. aw shit, you ran away before rin could give back your water bottle. the cute handle, decorated in randomness is still hanging off of his pointer and middle finger. “…her water bottle.” he said and sae is looking at it too.

you wish it was darker in your room. but you hate the dark.

it was the dead of night, phone tucked under you and you’re just hugging your elongated cat plush like you’re going to die if you let go. despite the vibrations from your phone that went off hours ago and is still occasionally vibrating, you ignore it.

maybe you had yourself to blame, you were curious, you snooped, and got hurt. but you know you’re a dick for snooping around, evading some guy’s privacy for your curiosity? ew.

don’t tell your younger self you did that of else you probably wouldn’t be here right now (your younger self would’ve DIED on the DOT) perhaps that is what you want, you don’t need another voice yelling into your ear.

deep down, you know you’re trying to stop their relationship from getting too real for you. it’s always been real, you just need a slap back to reality, you hate it.

really, you hate it so much.

tears dripping down onto the plush and wets the rest of your face along with it. you reminisce about how you lost so much of your youth chasing him, a chase he wasn’t even aware of. grimacing at how many men you turned down because they weren’t sae.

why must he treat you like this?

treat you like he isn’t treating you.

it isn’t his fault he’s in love with ito hana. yet you’re blaming him for your misery, he has you wrapped around his finger, willing to do anything for him, without his knowledge. loving him isn’t ideal, loving him for five, almost six years is miserable.

the question still stands, would he have loved you if you were first?

you’re a cruel man, itoshi sae

he can’t help but think of his phone, him typing nonsense into the text bar before deleting all of it. he wants to apologize, for making you and rin uncomfortable but when his girlfriend is clutching onto him so tightly, he gives in.